Biography

Cayn White, a performance poet based in West Yorkshire, started performing poetry over three years ago (or Saturday 10th September 2005 at 9pm to give the actual date and time!) supporting Attila the Stockbroker and (fortunatly) is constantly improving from that fatefull night in Hebden Bridge.
Influenced by the likes of Attila the Stockbroker, Nick Tocseck, Tv Smith and John Cooper Clarke (among many others) his poems touch on a range of subjects from the pollitically motivated to the humourous to the downright surreal.
Cayn has performed countless gigs in the past three years including, Punk gigs, Poetry nights, World Music Festivals, Awards Ceremonies, Anti Racist Gigs, and many fund raisers for various causes proving he knows where to put his heart.
As well as these gigs and numerous radio appearances he has also supported John Cooper Clarke, Attila the Stockbroker, Nick Tocseck, Little Brother, Ed Tudorpole, Jules, Tv Smith, Sham 69, Goldblade, The Anti Nowhere League, Gbh and various other poets and bands.
Cayn who is now working harder than ever before with many projeccs on the go now has the strongest material to date and is looking to showcase his poems and stories anywhere in the Uk, to book him email Cayn666@btinternet.com
Speaking of books, Cayns first collection of poems under the title of "Drunk and Incapable" somehow managed to sell out of all copies in just over two months, a re-print is been considered
Also "It'll Be Cayn White on the Night" the first documentary about the four year career of Cayn White has been completed and a follow up is on the way.
AND "Menace to Sobriety" The first Cayn White poetry album featuring live and recorded tracks is also in the works hopefully for a Christmas Release


Disclaimer: When booking or watching Cayn White please realise that he is what is often referred to as a "Punk Poet" and therefore may be slightly different to the poets you are used to watching. His poems also touch on a variety of subjects that although meant as comedic can rub people the wrong way so if you are easily offended you have been forewarned!
Also Cayn White hates drunken people who can't heckle properly, if you are going to heckle, please try and be a little bit sober and say something intellegent or funny, that way he won't be able to get the better of you and you won't leave the gig feeling angry and embarrased!
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Reviews:
Taken from Dave- Fungalpunk


A few faces arrived and as the evening progressed it was great to catch up with a few quality people. NOTE: Jim 'n' Arlene - cheers for the Rum and Coke - phew - and the sherry will be waiting for ya in December - glug, glug. First on tonight was the irrepressible Cayn White - punk poet and professional pisspot ha, ha. I have a lot of respect for this guy and his up-front attitude and likeable nature. A grand lad to have at any gig and one who enjoys the scene for what it is. His performance tonight was a pure ad-lib hotch-potch and oozed chaos and unprofessionalism. With Cayn you get what you get and within the punk scene this should be accepted. I told him afterwards that I like what he does but know that in certain circles he would get an undeserved caning from people who deem to know better. Was there anyone tonight who didn't smile with Cayns lunacy? Was there anyone who didn't find his 'have a go' attitude admirable? Was there anyone who didn't think Cayn is a fuckin' noodle ha, ha? Love it or loathe it the lad gets up and gives his all and that does for me. His obsession with granny porn and the like is becoming alarming and I am sure further investigations would reveal some nasty secrets! The banter with the crowd is a nice extra with Mr White’s performances and his 'shuffling through papers, reading out notes, conversations between recitals' approach is as funny as fuck. A crazed opening and one that relaxed the crowd - keep at it fella and remember to get scribbling and squeeze yerself dry.
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Taken from: http://www.fungalpunknature.co.uk/FUNGALPUNK/CDReviews/BOOKSPage%201.html

CAYN WHITE - DRUNK AND INCAPABLE

I paid £3 for this collection of poems and did so, with pleasure, in advance of its release. Why? Because Cayn White is a likeable lad who has got off his arse and had a go and participating in this scene that is ideal for anyone willing to chance their arm. The previous time I'd seen Cayn strut his stuff was at The Yorkshire Punks Picnic in Halifax where he was amiable and most importantly - pissed as a fart! The obvious influences are indeed just that - obvious - but Cayn does things his way and throws in many of his efforts with a complete DIY attitude. That, my dear reader, will do for me and after receiving my copy of this book and reading almost immediately I am more than convinced it was brass well spent.

What do you get for your money though? Well fuck all if you ain't already got a copy because this was a limited run that has now sold out. That'll teach ya! If you did get a copy then you get 18 easy to read and relate to rhymes that will raise a smile and many a titter. Cayn has many a good point to make and does so with a sense of the perverse and idiotic never far away. Tales of bird flu, biscuits falling into cups of tea, being trapped in a porn shop and dating a psychopath all seem fantastical but the hard edged stuff is in there as well with the poignancy and heartbreak of 'For A Friend' and 'A Glimpse Of God' certainly noteworthy.

I have no favourites here as I enjoyed each and every scribbling and I accept it isn't the most profound prose to hit the shelves but it is very fuckin' real and done by someone who ain't afraid to commit to the cause and have his say. Volume 2 should be on the way soon so get them coins ready to roll Cayns way.

Samples

A Glimpse Of God

As such, she wasn't much of a religious person
But she did once catch a glimpse of God,
In the form of a drunken, foul mouthed, abusive creature
Known, rather laughably, as her husband
She didn't do anything wrong of course
(People in these type of situations seldom do)
Except ask where he's been
And wonder out loud why he was in such a state
But from too much lager decended a red mist
Along with a fist
She caught the blow
And her first glimpse of "God"

Meanwhile:
Upstairs, lay the only evidence that love did once exist between that couple
Just the one piece of evidence, mind you, in the form of a child,
He laid there, scared, frightened,
Not knowing what to do
Not aware of what caused the trouble
Just aware that it was present.
And he lay there,
Frightened, that one day he may have to pick sides
Between the two people whom he loved,
In the way most children loved their parents of course.
But it would be that unconditional love that would be the first casuality
In years to come, when the custody battles and the social services
Become a horrific reality

The neighbours, obviously tried to help,
But only moved in once the trouble was finished
And it was too late
But it gave them the feelgood factor
And something to gossip about,
Before getting back to there dull, dreary, non-soap opera like lives
After all it was just a drunken man out on the batter,
And no-one was "really" hurt-
Were they?

Cayn White 2008
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Where Ale Is Sold


In the place where jokes never get old
And no one gets tired of the stories told
Where unrational dramas tend to unfold
Thats where you'll find me
Where people happily exchange tit for tat
Where uniforms and status really aren't all that
And no one notices that the ale is flat
Thats where you'll find me
Where bloated beer guts are well fed
And countless tears are countlessly shed
Where drunken promises are drunkenly made
Thats where you'll find me
When red letters are an unwanted reality
When you know you can't really cope with me
When you want to pack my bags and set me free
You'll know where to find me
When things between us have turned so bland
When everythings gone out of hand
And you leave that note hoping I'll understand
You'll know where to find me
When all your world collapses around you
And you've booze and tablets and still don't know what to do
And solutions to be found all add up to nil
I'll never let you find me

Cayn White
2009

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The New Rock And Roll

Take to the stage
Red in the face
We're set to amaze
Ready to set your world ablaze
This is what we do, we're in total control
This is our poetry, the new rock and roll


Come to the gig and what do you find?
No instruments for us to hide behind
No crap, no lies, just you and me
Performances packed wall to wall with energy
Staying true to ourselves, never to sell our souls
This is what we do, this is our rock and roll


And then when you look into my eyes
You see not one hidden extra, not one suprise
Just a beating heart with no apologies
Not an on stage politician with bullshit policies

And after three years I might have gone on too long
I'm still going nowhere, but still going strong
Giving it all I have, heart body and soul
This is what I do, this is my rock and roll

Cayn Whtie 2009

All poems are copyright of the originating author. Permission must be obtained before using or performing others' poems.

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