Feather Power
Posted on Wednesday 3rd March 2010 9:28 pm
Write Out Loud Profile: http://writeoutloud.net/poets/davedunn
Write Out Loud Blog: http://writeoutloud.net/blogs/davedunn
After a lot of years in technical writing and marketing I took on the role of carer for my late wife and our 3 children in the mid nineties, so all forms of writing took a back stage for a while. Now there's just my son left in school as my middle child has just completed A levels. I've been writing poetry rather more regularly for the last 15 months, using various social networks and a few poetry forums to display my work.
Sept 1st 2009 - Back again now after my cervical spine surgery, I'm having to rest most of the day but aim to dip in and out of the web as I can. Already getting some sensations back in my hands as the pressure on the nerves has been relieved. :)
February 3rd 2010 - Now moved into our new home in town - kids very happy to be near the centre of all things local :) BT will be along next week to install the broadband and phone so I should be active online again after that.......
Excess Memories
I awoke to silhouettes of images long suppressed
Those which rose from their internment within grey depths
Flickering with hesitance as from draft blown oil lamps
Wound round with broken elements of sad irrelevance
A bathroom strewn with her damp towels and brushes
The muddled aromas of jasmine and retching assaulting us
Long hair held back by my then firm hands during gasping
That came between her bouts of drink fuelled choking
Tear stained cheeks and serial sorrys during her guilty glances
At a man she then barely knew who tried to overwrite
Jaundiced views of men gained from events afore that night
Shaking from exhaustion as dryness came to end that spell
Face bathed with flannel and water to freshen her well
Seeing her safely settled on the sofa in adjacent room
Window allowing a glimpse of near full moon
That seemed to drift though it could but be the clouds
Saying 'are you ok now' as she still moaned aloud
Bowl placed within reach of out flung arm
Saying I'll be off then you'll be safe from harm
Wondering what was the event that lead to that excess
Feeling slightly guilty at leaving such a ghastly mess
(c)Rhumour
May 11th 2009
All poems are copyright of the originating author. Permission must be obtained before using or performing others' poems.
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Thanks for taking the time to read my poem 'Pulling a Sickie' Dave! I will look forward to reading more of your work :-)
Hi Dave, Hope your move went well. glad to see you back with us again and posting blogs once more. Win x
Hello Dave - thanks for paying me a visit. Yes - I would agree with you that religions probably do more good than ill and like you I am a humanist. Just wanted to write a poem looking at exactly what divides us in life and that is what came out - powerful stuff... I wish you a speedy recovery from your operation and also happiness in your new home. xx
Hi Dave, thank you for your comment on my poem. 'Lilley', is very dear to me as is 'Glass Eyes'. Both written in the last few weeks on the birthday of my son, who would have been 11 this year and going to high school.
Funny, being an English teacher, I tend to push the point that poetry is subjective to the reader. Although, poetry, simply by it's mere existence is subjective to the writer.
thank you again for your warm and heartfelt comments. Take care, and keep on writing. For me, writing helps me process thoughts and emotions that maybe I don't want to burden others with. ( I have written some fun stuff though ).
Peace be with you too.
DAVE!
Stick to Lincolnshire...don't be fooled by Yorkshire charm hehe x
Hello Dave, thanks for your recent comment. Enjoyed reading your stuff, 'excess memories' clearly painful but stunning.
John
Hi Dave - I have made some changes to ‘Blood Onion’, which you were so kind to leave a comment on recently. Could you please go to the blog entry and see if you think these changes are for the better or make sense to you.
Not read this out yet, Glad you liked the “Throbs” I thinks it works. You are right about the final cut of the knife at the end.
Cheers, Win
Hello Dave
I find that cat-motivation poems work especially well if you shake a box of Go-Cat (or similar) in time with the rhythm. I've noticed that they soon prick their ears up.
Best wishes
Rachel P
Lincolnshire...what's there? Grimsby et al??
I'm afraid I don't know of anything east of ... Lancashire hehe.
If I had a choice between Yorks and Scots - I'd be Scottish every time haha. As it stands, I am probably extremely English with no particular rooting!
Thanks Dave,
I know! I feel I owe it to my name to become Welsh one day but sadly, I remain distinctly un-Welsh.
I live closer to Wales than I ever have though :) - result!
Hi Dave, thanks for your comment on What Do You See,......Ive never been one to take shit without fighting back, and I think this poem expresses my personality quite well!!!!! Im learning to be a little more laid back as I grow older disgracefully though!!
Cate xx
shoeless
Sun 26th Jul 2009 20:29
Thankyou for your encouraging comments today David
Hi Dave,
Been looking tonight at your recent postings... Very different to the style of "Excess memories" which is such an amazing thing. This may be a good thing for you though! keep writing. Winston
Thanks for taking time to read Dave - glad you liked my rant...
Isobel x
Sun 19th Jul 2009 14:14
Dave, thanks for understanding that I would say anything only if I like what I'm reading, a lot. Otherwise, why would I bother?
Dave, just read your poem 'Become A Little Sage'
Good rhyme and flow... Can tell you were inspired by Lennon...
Will read more.
Thank you for taking the time to read and comment on my work...
I appreciate the fact that you also see the page set up of my poem 'Elusive' as an aide in how it would be read...
I couldn't get it exactly how I wanted it though... Always seem to have trouble with fonts, size, and placement - it just won't show up properly on here for some reason.
Hi Again Dave
Its a pleasure, this is a great site, you will find some fantastic poetry and some fantastic people. Win
Hi Dave,
welcome to WOL Thanks for your comments on Pedro, its a bit of fun. As to your poem Excess Memories, it is stark, it is vivid and grim and hits home with a force. Brilliant. It is my type of poem in many ways. Thanks for posting, Win
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John Coopey
Sat 6th Mar 2010 16:30
Dave
Thanks for the comment on Our Gert.
There seem to be so few of us who practice rhythm and rhyme. I'm not dogmatic about it (although it is my preference), so refreshing to see your stuff. Keep posting.