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John Coopey

Email: johncoopey@tiscali.co.uk

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Last blog entry: Tue, 29 Jun 2010 06:44:10 pm

Profile updated: Fri, 19 Mar 2010 11:09:55 pm

 

Biography

A good all-rounder at nowt. A bit like a poet, only fatter.
Just started doing stuff in Open Mic. Mainly rubbish, that gets a good cheer. Not often booed off, but on occasions, booed on.
References available from mi mam to say I'm very good.
Don't do anything weighty (or thoughtful, for that matter).
Hobbies - Waiting, Turnips. No, not turnips anymore, just waiting.
Wow! - just learned how to do these audio files. You can get ready now!

Samples

Our Gert

Our Gert allus moans
at all of mi poems,
She says as they all sound t’same;
Just tum-titty tum,
ti tum titty tum,
Then tum titty tum again.

But when she complains
I try to explain
It’s not really me in control;
Without any doubt
when it comes out
It’s t’rhythm as what’s on a roll.

I don’t hold a grudge
but she’s not a good judge
Of what constitutes good poetry.
Her attitude’s based
on very poor taste
And perpetual PMT.

I don’t think it’s fair
for her to compare
Me wi’ t’Stratford bard;
He’s long departed,
I’ve only just started
An’ findin’ it ever so ‘ard.

Iambic pentameters,
Shakespeare wrote,
(Blank verse as a rule of thumb),
And 14 line sonnets
an’ 5 Act plays -
But he couldn’t do tum titty tum.



Starbuck’s

I could have purchased saffron
(The colour, not the rice);
Or gold or even platinum
At less than half the price

I could have bought a work of art -
One Picasso’d drawn,
Or half a gram of you-know-what
Or powdered rhino horn;

Or shares in half a racehorse
And put it out to stud;
Or cleared the national debt of Chad
Honestly, I could!

I could have bought a woman
And danced the old Hand Jive;
Instead I bought a coffee
That cost £2.95.

All poems are copyright of the originating author. Permission must be obtained before using or performing others' poems.

Last blog entry

England Exit Haiku

Posted on Tuesday 29th June 2010 6:44 pm

"Great Expectations"

Then "Pride Comes Before a Fall"

"Les Miserables!"

 

Previous: Research

 

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Comments

Dianna Hardy

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Thu 1st Jul 2010 16:00

Hi John, thanks very much for your comment on my profile - I was chuffed! Will be blogging more soon. Love 'Our Gert' and look forward to reading more. Dianna.

 

Ann Foxglove

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Wed 30th Jun 2010 09:12

Ta John (Falling in Love by Surprise) for your kind comments! x

 

Ann Foxglove

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Thu 13th May 2010 08:59

Agree with your discursive apathy comment. We all write dross! (Well, I know I do!)Up with dross I say! I'm off for a while - can't stand the heat in this particular kitchen. Take good care! x

 

Ann Foxglove

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Thu 29th Apr 2010 07:23

Thanks for commenting recently on me poems John. Glad you like Shirley and Dolly. And Sandy Denny, "Who Knows Where The Time GOes" is one of the best songs ever. Re adding a bridge to Blackthorn - I would have added a bridge but I didn't manage to get planning permission! Tehe!

 

ray miller

Mon 12th Apr 2010 12:34

Thanks John,we've managed to stay in contention for honours until Easter and that, I suppose, is as successful as we get.

 

Gus Jonsson

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Sat 10th Apr 2010 09:54

Thank you John

Yes I often wonder how many of our merry band here on WOL bother to study construction beat and tap out the rhythm. Painting words to a drama or a scene.

I used to set workshop sessions years ago, but now I just play with myself.

By the way I hope your teeth are nicely settled and safely in a glass beside your bed as we speak.

Thanks again
Gus

 

winston plowes

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Sun 4th Apr 2010 23:22

Hi John, Thought you might like this. It's obviously from a while back -

Will Ronaldo?

Will eighty million pounds
Be too much for an arrogant kid?

Or will Ronaldo be crowned
As top scorer at Real Madrid?

Or will his talents be found
To be lacking and they will get rid?

And will Ronaldo be bound
To return to us, heaven forbid?

 

ray miller

Sun 4th Apr 2010 20:56

Hello John. I used to think I was a Villain, but I learnt recently that I'm a Villan. Political Correctness, I think.I wrote a poem at the start of the season about mid-table inertia etc. that I'll post after we've lost to Chelsea next week. Try some Viagra, John.

 

ray miller

Sat 3rd Apr 2010 22:21

Very succinct, John, brevity's the soul of wit, and all that.

 

Isobel

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Sat 3rd Apr 2010 15:55

Thanks for your allusion to Aristotle - who the hell was he? He sounds profound - I shall have to do some research! LOL

 

hatta

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Sat 3rd Apr 2010 14:20

Hello Coopey! Who 'he'?

 

Augusta Darling

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Fri 2nd Apr 2010 18:44

Thank You John .. Thank you for recognising a style reminisent of Longfellow... Were it only one % as good... still I try... thank you for your remarks about my legs... perhaps you could show us yours...??

Augusta x

 

ray miller

Fri 2nd Apr 2010 13:46

John, yes "guarantee full well" I recognise. Ta for your comments on the funeral poem. It were nerve-wracking but the red wine and Valium saw me through.

 

Rev Two-Sheds

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Thu 1st Apr 2010 09:08

hey that's OK boss... I really enjoy reading you poetyry...somehow i f must be something to do with the spacing and way you put things down] - funny thing is i can seem to write OK - yet reading is very difficult for me ina random unexpilcable waye... it can be very frustrating f'sure... just keep 'em coming eh?
toodle pip
R2$

 

winston plowes

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Wed 31st Mar 2010 17:02

Hi john.. gave a nod to The George and Dragon on Monday as I passed on my bicycle (Twice)Win :-)

 

winston plowes

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Wed 24th Mar 2010 10:38

Hi John Thanks for looking in. I know West Haddlesey. As a lad I lived for my first 10 years in Selby just off doncaster road! My mum still lives there and by brother in Barlow. In fact I know the G & D too. I will be cycling past it on next mon or tue twice as part of a 200km ride from My home in Hebden Bridge to North Cave and back "walking in six string heaven" - I am a big fan of rock guitar I'm afraid. I will think of Coopey's groupies when I pass. Win x

 

Augusta Darling

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Tue 23rd Mar 2010 14:48

You just sit back and watch then John ... as long as you find it all to your satisfaction... I'm happy

Augusta xx

 

Dave Dunn aka Rhumour

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Fri 5th Mar 2010 22:58

Our Gert is a fine laff - I could hear that one in my head :)

 

Isobel

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Sun 28th Feb 2010 21:48

Didn't you mean to say - 'because' you were standing up, you had to stay on till Aberdeen...
That has to be the most amusing excuse for shooting past one's stop - I have only ever done that due to drunkenness.

 

Isobel

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Fri 19th Feb 2010 11:57

Many thanks for your comment on my love sonnet John.

Isobel x

 

David Cooke

Wed 10th Feb 2010 16:49

Hi John Glad to have discovered another fan of the blues!

 

Jonboy Walton

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Sun 7th Feb 2010 17:22

Hi John,
Loved Our Gert! Can totally understand the lingo also which isn't too dissimilar to Wigan speak! I remember you reading this at the Tudor in my hometown! Keep up the good work lad!

 

Steve Mellor

Mon 25th Jan 2010 20:36

Hi John
Mnay thanks for the compliment.
Feel free to give it a go. I won't tell anyone in York if you don't.
I suppose it is the type of poem that you could have written.
I'm very flattered for the time taken to leave your comment.
Steve

 

Augusta Darling

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Thu 10th Dec 2009 18:40

Thank you for comments re; Hunter's Moon' Sometimes on wooded walks I feel this enormous history of legend and myth... and you are right it is quiet chilling, Like the Teddy Bears say... 'Don't go down into the Woods Today
Thank you again so very much for your encouragement and comments.

Augusta x

 

Quirky Verse

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Wed 9th Dec 2009 10:16

Pleased you enjoyed the Quirky Verses - both true stories. After reading "Our Gert" I bet you and Ian Macmillan are never seen in the same place at the same time. I think that's a compliment.

 

Malpoet

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Tue 8th Dec 2009 20:37

Thanks for your comment John. Much appreciated.

 

Dave Carr

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Sat 21st Nov 2009 00:10

Enjoyed hearing your poems at the Tudor.

 

spencer

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Sun 8th Nov 2009 03:30

Thanks for reading and commenting on my work John. I had a good night at Wicked Words last week, my cough had gone and I managed to get three good ones out without any fuss, the crowd were happy so that's a decent yardstick.
Man boobs are scary , I am getting the tummy and becuase I slim I have to be extra careful or I look like a knot in cotton !!.
Cheers
Spencer

 

Dave Bradley

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Thu 29th Oct 2009 20:49

Hi John

Looks like you tried to blog and ended up posting a comment on your profile. Why not have another go at blogging. The poem is good fun and well written, and good value for a blog.

 

John Coopey

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Mon 26th Oct 2009 23:24

Pressed a button and deleted loads!
Not sure where this ends up.

 

Jessie Alpal

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Wed 14th Oct 2009 10:46

Thank you for the encouragement!

 

spencer

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Tue 13th Oct 2009 11:26

Hey John , thanks for the comments and yes St Peppers is a classic album which is well locked into the jukebox of historical recordings. A Day In Life !!!!.

 

John Coopey

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Fri 9th Oct 2009 18:53

Thanks Spencer.
I really enjoyed Tuesday and nice to meet you.
I've been to a couple of Open Mics before but they were 10% Poems and 90% Discussion - mostly a load of bollocks. So Chapel Allerton was a pleasant revelation.
Keep posting.
John

 

spencer

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Fri 9th Oct 2009 13:29

Nice to of met you the other night , I have just about got over my coughing fit. It would have to happen as I am about to read and put me off my stride. I liked your spot it was great.

 

Yolande

Wed 7th Oct 2009 21:35

Hi John
Thanks for your comment on my poem. I too think there is room for humour sometimes in poems. I enjoyed reading yours about the Light Brigade.
Regards Yolande

 

Isobel

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Wed 7th Oct 2009 18:18

Hi John, thanks for your comments on my profile. I wouldn't worry about not doing weighty stuff - it isn't to everyone's taste anyway - a number of poeple find my stuff naive and immature. There is a market for every style on this site - that is the great thing about it.
Till we meet again. x

 

spencer

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Wed 7th Oct 2009 17:44

Thanks for the comments on my words. Keep up the good work mate!.

 

spencer

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Wed 7th Oct 2009 16:52

A good bit of humour with a helping of the cheek -great.

 

Isobel

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Sat 26th Sep 2009 10:25

Would agree with Janet. Great to see humour on this site - not enough people do it. Get some more stuff up quick.

 

Janet

Sat 26th Sep 2009 10:16

Then put up some more. It really did make me titter. To be honest i wouldn't be able to tell a rubbish poem from a great one but i know what i like.

Janet.x

 

John Coopey

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Sat 26th Sep 2009 09:57

Thanks Janet. There's plenty more where that came from - all equally rubbish!
John

 

Janet

Thu 24th Sep 2009 20:49

Hilarious! Very funny! Best laugh i've had all day. Thankyou so very much. :-)
Tum te tum. brilliant.
Janet.x

 

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