David Dunn - The Poet in a Suit

Biography

My poetry is contemporary political and social satire. I position myself in a line of satirists from the Victorian and Edwardian Music Hall through Victor Borge and Tom Lehrer to Tim Minchin - albeit without using a piano. I can play one though, honest! Audiences find my performances deliciously humorous - I no longer say 'outrageously funny' after last summer when a group of bankers at Walton Heath Golf Club sat through the poem I'd written especially for them, 'The Bank's a Marvel'. (If you want to see the poem being performed, click on my website and go to performances.)

Samples

THE BANK'S A MARVEL Fiercely independent until slightly overspent, Then needing to be bailed out by the state. No-one wanted that – the party went quite flat And the shame! To borrow cash at zero rate. Actually, that’s quite funny – because whenever we lend money, We demand a huge rate of return. But when money’s without strings, banks can do creative things, Like pay tax at one per cent on what they earn. Now, to all of those who say banks shouldn’t ever pay Bonuses – I’d say, they need shaking to their senses. There’s been a whopping rise in VAT and, on top of that, We’re not MPs. We don’t fiddle our expenses. Actually it’s quite an onus to spend your annual bonus When your salary’s already 800 grand. Measured pound for pound, it’s the best paid job around. But without the perks, I’d have to move from England. For us – remuneration. While for you – commiseration. We realise things out there are getting worse. It’s a shame your social tonic is so harsh and economic. But then we live in a parallel universe. Let’s give thanks to British banks. They are not like the West Bank. The bank dividing Palestinians and Jews. British banks create no schisms or new socio-economic divisions. It’s always been the case: We Win, You Lose.

All poems are copyright of the originating author. Permission must be obtained before using or performing others' poems.