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TikTok TikTok TikTok times running out.
I watched Trump on the TV set
When a loud knocking
Was at my door.
I’d just come from my shower floor.
So I put on a dressing gown.
She stood there wearing a mask
I wandered who I was afraid to ask.
Had I seen her before?
My mate came round
He had a Hauwai phone
He makes plastic tops for plastic bottles
Here he was in my home
Now they’d got us.
Damn reds!
I looked behind my chair
Searched under the stair
Couldn’t find a red anywhere.
Trump told me to take great care
So I looked carefully at her hair.
It looked black and slick and clean
But I knew Chinese commies could be mean
I didn’t know which way to rock
I’d already deleted TikTok.
I thought I was safe!
Her eyes looked round but who could tell
Them darn commies can be sneaky as hell.
They’d read all my mail!
The message I’d sent to my mum
Asking her for some chewing gum!
The one to my oldest mate
Shall we have a pint or is it to late?
Now the Chinese commies know
All there is about my life and my gumless strife.
I thought I’d call for advice, “leave a message”.
I got that one twice!
Damn these Chinese reds messing with my phone
From under my bed, yep the reds did it!
So I turned back to her and asked scared
“Why are you there”?
“Its your pork fried rice” she said!
With a Polish accent.
So I took a shot of Dettol
Straight from the bottle.
Now I’m laid here think I’m dying
I coughed up my blood
And looked at the bottle.
“Made in China”.
Damn reds finally got me!