Police are investigating dog thefts in Read,

No arrests made yet,but police are following a lead.

 

A man fell into a tank of beer in Southend,

Sadly   he has come to a bitter end.

 

A man jumped into a river in France called Wayne,

Newly released from a mental institution,was in Seine.

 

A large hole has appeared in a nudist camp in Newmarket,

Police are looking into it,no arrests have been made yet.

 

The weather

A weather forcaster's words to a newscaster she did adore,

"Let it rain,let it pour,because you don't love me anymore !"