I want to claw out my mind

and my heart the same.

I’m no more than a cadaver.  

I’m dead inside

with living flesh to hide

the tomb within. 

Dead man’s bones

rattle when I speak. 

Please let me close my eyes

and sleep forever

a dreamless sleep. 

I will not awake again

until the nightmare is over.  

But will the nightmare end?

And how will it end?

With my demise? 

Who will resurrect the dead?

Who will bring to life

this corpse wrapped in skin?

Who will resuscitate 

the lump in my chest,

the hardened lump of clay

that was once the seat of life in me?

Who will still the storm

in my head

and cause the waves

that pound against me mercilessly

to finally be abated?

Why is the sun

swallowed up in clouds?

Where is the warmth of its smile?

It is hidden from me

and I am cold in my searching. 

I have dug my own grave

and am ready to lay myself down. 

I need no pillow,

the earth will comfort me. 

I seek no mourners;

eternity will be my consolation.