“Going down the pub darling”

 

“For what reason?”

 

“It’s the football season

and I want to see my mates

To discuss some dates

of the games and stuff”

 

“I’ve had enough

You’re not going”

 

“Oh stop moaning

I’m only having the one”

 

“You mean one too many

Well you’re not having any

‘cos you’re staying in”

 

“Oh stop your din

I’m getting my coat”

 

“If you do, I’ll have your throat”

and your guts for garters

That’s just for starters”

 

“Chill out babe 

I won’t be late”

 

“No! 

Right the kids are in bed

and I’M going to the pub instead”.