I don’t want to close my eyes

I know what happens when sleep takes me

Memories and fears claw their way to the surface

Cackling while I squirm in pain

I am so tired

But I fear my sleeping mind

Replaying the moments that broke my heart

Filling me with lead

Seemingly impossible to pull myself out of those dark memories

I’m not afraid of the dark…but what is expected in that darkness

Rest

Rest but never peace

I do not wish to start another day by wiping away dried tears

Mourning those who still walk but choose to not cross my path

Mourning the potential of a life less scarred

I should be happy…but I just feel so broken in this moment

I’m so tired of seeing all the cracks where I bleed through

Why can’t they stay closed

Why must the damn always break

Why must I revisit moments i wish to forget