Always searching for the next good time

and what the world can bring.

Always looking for the next big deal

and what it’s offering.

 

Never thinking very far ahead

or worrying about the cost.

Never wanting much to understand

or caring what gets lost.

 

Always thinking I don’t need to change,

believing that I’m fine.

Always doing what I want to do

and taking what is mine.

 

Never listening to their advice,

for surely they don’t know.

Never going to let them think I’m down,

or I’m out of control.

 

Always needing more to get the fix

and more to pay the price.

Always promising I’ll give it up,

my own strength will suffice.

 

Never thought that things would be this way.

Won’t let them know the cause.

Never going to let myself admit

the damage that it does.

 

Always going through the cycle.

Always starting up again.

Always finding out the hard way

that there’s just no way to win.

 

Never going stop the bleeding

or the guilt or all the pain,

so the shell of me that people see…

is all that will remain.