I close my eyes and you're here

Your smile is contagious

I can't stop smiling back

You have that knack

of making me blush as well.

I never blush this much unless

you're near.

Heck, you have made me blush

in person

on video chat

and a few times in our texting

You have a power over me

that is undeniable.

Now all alone in my room

thinking of your smile

thinking of your perfect lips

thinking of your brown eyes

shining like stars,

pulling me in.

I feel weak inside but also

Happy because I know in the

only way you can, you love me.

You loved me

when we rode the ferry

when we fed the seagulls Simits

from the man selling them at the

cart by the water.

You loved me when we sat in the

sidewalk cafe and drank beers

and laughed and you told me

to tell my American friends

that your people weren't much

different than they are.

We saw punk rocker, emo types

walk by

and Preppy rich kid types with

their $200 tennis shoes.

And we also saw the women all in black

skirts with Hijabs on to honor

their customs too.

You laughed and said you respect it

but it wasn't for you.

I said good because your hair is

too beautiful to hide.

Those raven locks, with just a little

curl on the end from where you twirl it

I could spend a hundred years

watching you tuck your hair behind

your ear. Or watch you shake your head

to get your hair out of your face.

My typing stops. I take a brief second

to envision you in my mind.

Eyes closed, I smell your perfume

the bottle you gave me before I got on

the plane. Now…

Everything looks like you.

Everything smells like you.

It definitely helps.

I feel you close to me in this moment.

This 20 minutes of almost nonstop writing

of babbling with my quick typing fingers

and imagination of you and only you.

10 months until I land in Istanbul

10 months until I see that smile

10 months before we walk hand and hand

in the park again, before I taste

your mother's Dolma and drink Cay

from the little cafe.

Every cell in my body wants to see

that smile, hear that laugh, listen

to your English saying "Congratulations!"

like you love to practice saying.

We'll name each part of your body in English

you'll stumble as always on the word "KNEE"

You'll call toes, foot fingers. and

we'll all laugh because, Yes, those

beautiful children will be there.

My soul and everything I am loves

them. And if I hadn't said it lately

I adore you. You are my best friend,

my champion, my words of encouragement

when I need them.

I will never let this 6000 miles

defeat us, never.