FANTASY FOOTBALL

By the Urban Poet

Red and white, blue and green

What colour represents your football team?

Is it the colour they actually play in?

Or is it the one that they play away in?

 

These days of course,

some teams have three strips

To make you shell out more money

when you’re on your away trips

 

How long will the new manager last?

Longer than those sacked in the past?

But being sacked can be a managers dream

They get ‘compensation’ for picking

a useless team

 

Results are what they’re judged on of course

Getting knocked out of cups makes it worse

This may be the only opportunity for success

Chances of winning the league are much less

 

The boardroom is the ‘powerhouse’

But some chairmen are more like Mickey Mouse, when it comes to running a club

Some go bankrupt, they can’t do the maths

People say they couldn’t run a bath

 

The players themselves can be a pain

Ducking, diving, never wanting to train

They’ll fake everything including injury

Especially if it’s being shown on TV

 

The VAR will catch them out

So falling over giving an excruciating shout

won’t fool the ref and his assistants

The cameras will have it sorted in an instant

 

But the fans will have the final say

The players can kick and scream all day

But it’s bums on seats that fund their pay

If the team Is crap and not performing 

The supporters can start walking

Faster than their team can run

And that’s it folks our club is f… done!

From the new book ‘100 More Reasons for Rhyme’ By ‘Rick’ Varden 2023