My test results arrived today                               

They confirm what I've known for a while

That all my efforts have been in vain

Eating fruit and veg was futile

Exercise has been a waste of time

Grains, pulses, supplements...all useless

I can't stop myself dying

 

But I won't be dying anytime soon

I won't be shuffling off in the near future

I will however die eventually

I will die in the fullness of time

My test results were clear

So although I will die in due course

I won't be popping off this year