Crafty Crafters

 

It’s a decoupage sticking, cross stitching

Stamping, stitching, fixing, knitting

A mobility scooting, craft knife scoring

“Out of me way!” tooting, topper adorning

Way of life for some

Hobby obsessed hobbyists

Haberdasher hangers-on

These hard-core followers can be found

Spending hundreds of pounds

On paper pieces and bits of foam

Plastic pellets as precious to them as gold

Salivating at the thought of assembly at home

They will bare fist fight at the sight

Of fifty per cent offs

Spit and scratch and pull on hair

They will go below the belt for a new punch

In the shape of a butterfly

It ain’t just marker pens and glue that get ‘em all high

If it takes all week

And is ten times more expensive

Than buying it ready-made

They will make it

They will cut, sew, engrave, mould and bake it

No labour-saving

Attempting to flog their creations

For stupid fees

At frightening fairs full of freaks

Where the innocent by-stander can get sucked it

They provide one hell of a pull

It might as well be called a cult

‘Cause you’re gonna be living for

Threading, making, bejewelling, baking

Creating ever after

The life of a hard-core crafter.