Invisible

Sunday 7th August 2011 11:03 pm (first posted Thursday 9th June 2011 2:53 pm)

Invisible

Listening to mansun
As commuter faces
Swirl around me

Waiting for a bus
At kings cross
As the stream passes me

Cute girls
Short skirts
Black tights
Taunt me with
Unavailability

I am invisible
Long Grey hair
Unkempt
And beard
Street drinker chic

I don't care
I don't want them
To want me

I like the margins
The Borders
The edge

90s me wanted it all
Wanted to be
Wanted

Wanted to be
Noticed

As I smoke my
American spirit cigarette
I revel in my invisible
Cloak

Like a street drinking
Harry potter uncle
Weaving my own
Magic

Comments

Martin Togher

Sun 7th Aug 2011 23:04

Cheers Julian, the double 'as' was a mistake - wrote it on my phone.

Julian (Admin)

Tue 14th Jun 2011 12:16

I like this, particularly this:

I like the margins
The Borders
The edge

It is something I have been thinking about a lot recently, the paradox of wanting to be noticed yet liking the edge, being in the margin. wonder what Sigmund would make of it?

Not sure you need the word 'as' twice in second stanza.
Thanks Martin

Laura Taylor

Mon 13th Jun 2011 13:36

That last verse is a corker

Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sun 12th Jun 2011 15:20

This sounds like a man with a real problem. You have hit a sharp nail here, those 'forty's types' who still eye the 'teens and twenties in their skimpy clothes and see only bodies 'taunting in their unavailability'. It's a very honest poem; but probably fools no one. 'Wanting to be noticed' is a modern society sickness. You've made a great social comment.

Greg Freeman

Thu 9th Jun 2011 15:28

I can identify with this, Martin ... well, waiting for a bus at King's Cross, anyway. And that swirl of people around the station can be exhilerating

Martin Togher

Thu 9th Jun 2011 15:02

When you get to your 40s, there is a feeling that you are invisible to people in their 20s.

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Invisible

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