Aston Villa! Aston Villa!
That’s my team
since I was knee-high
to a limousine

Come on West Ham
I used to scream
at Jeeves
he was an Arsenal man

West Brom United
I know I am
I’m sure I am
West Ham Albion til I decease

Ask any of my Eton chums, they’ll tell you
I’m a City fan - which one?
you know - City!
Newcastle City! Way Ay Mon

Burnley! Burnley! Burnley!
Ra! Ra! Ra!
Scunthorpe! Scunthorpe!
La-di-da-di-da!

Chesterfield Tuesday
Don’t you see I’m quite like you?
polo at the Guards Club
a box at Blackpool

I was only just saying to Rupert
at the Oxfordshire Hunt
that John Terry really is a
complete
footballer

St. Ockport County
Doncchester Rovers
Notting Hill Florist
I’ve been to every one

In the opposition section
cheering my team on
City! United!
Rangers! Celtic!
Academicals!

Aston Villa! Aston Villa!
That’s my team
since I was neck-high
to the guillotine