feeling sick sitting at roadsides spraying grass green wanting to cry because tiredness has confused everything wanting desperately to carry on wanting beyond anything for anyone to appear and feeling lost and empty and walking alone when loneliness is real daunting and wanting not to be this way carrying on at least until night falls and loneliness can be forgotten even in the house shared at home under blankets and protected with a warm cosy feeling together beside a log fire burning watching flames and faces and pictures of our youth disappear into ash beside the fire beside the roadside a place not a place left for solitude and solace ash cigarettes unite to the end empty crushed cardboard empty crushed cardboard coloured tinted dyed thrown into flooded ditches on roadsides feeling sick in foreign towns spraying sunflowers yellow for the sun and day and moon the memories of hillside walks of ferns and trees coloured brown ash fire memories blowing dust over covers of fallen moss climbing creeping growing shrinking sliding dying under violet skies and helicopters with flashing lights landing on high rise buildings belonging to someone and wandering away from the fire a patch of light hangs swinging from the bough of a tree illuminating an overgrown path to happiness where we never said goodbye

©Colsibabes 2015