My Noble Valentine

 

Oh Valentine, my Valentine,

Oh where oh where are you,

The children need their breakfast,

And there’s ironing still to do.

 

The washing up can wait an hour,

But where’s my purple sock,

The kitchen floor won’t clean itself,

You should be taking stock..

 

I don’t want oven chips again,

Potatoes there to peel,

And all this blessed packaged stuff,

It’s not a decent meal.

 

The vacuumings another thing,

This place is full of dust,

If you can’t keep an ordered house,

Then who am I to trust.

 

I know you’ve got your job as well,

But know it, so do I !

I’ve brought you to this pleasant life,

And that’s no bloody lie.

 

The pub is tidier than this place,

The barmaid doesn’t nag,

I really need a pint or two,

Our life is such a drag.

 

I’ve got one boss, I don’t need two.

I don’t need your complaints,

Between you and your whining brood,

I’m feeling the constraints.

 

I’ve got the Lodge and Rugby Club,

You’ve got Diazepam,

I need much more companionship,

For breaking through the dam.

 

I earn, you spend, that’s all there is,

The bargain is complete,

Without my help and my resource

We’d find you on the street.

 

Divorce, of course I think of that,

At least ten times a day,

In fact it occupies my mind,

A dream that’s here to stay

 

But February, the fourteenth day,

I’ll know your waiting there,

A petrol stations card and flowers,

Will let you know I care.