Special Day

Charity Kosta

Is there something wrong with me?

Am I being selfish and conceited

When all I can see is myself being defeated,

In a stupid competition of who is loved more?

When on my special day, getting notice was a chore,

Where all I got from loved ones was a happy birthday.

Yet, here comes my sister, and she is given a display

From everyone expressing their love,

And given everything she could think of.

 

Is there something wrong with me to be upset,

Over her special day while having this mindset?

When she is given gifts and cake

While I had nothing but heartbreak.

Where I got a hug and smile

And she gets everything worthwhile?

Where the highlight of my day had been a visit from friends

But for here it will be full of surprises with no end.

 

Is there something wrong with me,

That I would rather be an absentee

Than witness what will surely be a day of joy

And not be the one who destroys?

 

Is there something wrong with me to think

Of what she will have that I did not, and have my heart sink?

To know that her say will be so much better than mine,

And to not believe even myself when I say I’m fine.

To know that while the family will disagree,

It will show that they love her more than me.