Life is Anxiety

Tuesday 1st September 2009 3:43 pm

I see two sides to life:
worries and regrets,
stuffing up time.
They touch where I stand.

Regrets are here,
gnawing and growing,
here, on my side, always,
hanging like stone skin, dragging.
I feel them under my clothes,
under my blanket,
their cold dead crust unsheddable.
They knead my clay,
my fallen flesh, made edible.

Worries are there,
always,
looming dark and infinite
like the integers,
queuing to destroy me.
Worries,
the backlog, the crashing tide
always coming in,
they stain residue on my side.

To face or forget
these worries and regrets
is always easier said.

Stuffing up time,
they touch where I stand.
They join hands around my head.

Today I hold the mirror,
I face it and forget.
Today I clear my debt to the dead.

----------------------------------

It's a bit self-pitying, isn't it? Surely no-one in their right mind would be interested. Hence I present this for those in the wrong mind.

Comments

Anthony Emmerson

Fri 4th Sep 2009 17:14

Hi Marc,

Admired this very much. Very interesting and unusual presentation that works well. I guess that marks me out as one of those "in the wrong mind." I'm not usually a great fan of introspective poetry, but there's a lot that I suspect many will identify with here.

Regards,
A.E.

<Deleted User> (5646)

Thu 3rd Sep 2009 10:06

thanks for the explanatory comment Marc, but you shouldn't feel guilty at being alive. As for squandering precious life, precious moments are to be savoured and i think we all feel guilty of wasting time at one time or another.
This makes the poem even stronger i think.

Janet.x

<Deleted User> (6017)

Thu 3rd Sep 2009 07:59

What lovely comments, thank you all.

I think there is probably more than one poem there, yes Steve. Two for the price of one? I don't want to break it up now, and reconcile myself to it by claiming the middle section gives it a disjointed, schizophrenic feel.

Janet, I'm glad you got that feeling from the last line, that is partly what I meant by "clear my debt". I actually meant it in a more literal sense however. My "debt to the dead" is my guilt of being alive yet squandering precious life with pointless negative emotions that only hold me back.

<Deleted User> (5646)

Wed 2nd Sep 2009 13:45

Very interesting subject you tackled here i think.
I enjoyed the way you wrote the two side by side. They read into each other perfectly as well as individually.
I think i can answer Cynthias question, it's like once the worry or regret has been faced and then forgotten. It is dead. (the dead within ourselves) rather than in a literal sense.
It makes sense to me anyway unless i'm reading a little too much into it?

Janet.x

Cynthia Buell Thomas

Tue 1st Sep 2009 17:52

Marc, it is indeed. But it is still a very good poem for many poetic reasons. It will also talk to someone very deeply. I have reread this several times, and I honestly don't get the leap from the main body to the three-line conclusion. What does/do 'the dead' have to do with the main theme of your poem?

If you wish to post a comment you must login.

Life is Anxiety

Comments

Please consider supporting us