WORTHLESS

 

Due to the venomous words being spewed at each other, I lay awake listening in on the horrendous things being said.

“No one does anything to help me around this house!” “that’s not true Michelle, and you know it!” my step mother and father argue to each other.

“And don’t get me started on that blonde headed brat!” my stomach clenches “don’t you dare bring her into this!” relief overwhelms me. He actually defended me. “why not?! She doesn’t do anything anyway!” my heart drops to my toes. I can feel the burning sensation in the pit of my stomach grow. Fresh droplets fall down my cheeks as she utters the two words that instantly make my body go into a full on sob. “she’s worthless!” 

As I sob into my pillow all that comes to my head is “you’re worthless” luckily the pillow muffles out the apologies I say in-between my deep gasp for air.

“I’m sorry for not doing more”

“I’m sorry for not being enough for you”

“I’m sorry you hate me so much”

“I’m sorry for not showing you that I love you”

“I’m sorry for being worthless to everyone”

“I promise to try harder.”

After I end my apologies with my promise as a seal, my eyes get heavy, my heart rate slows and I drift off into a deep, deep slumber.