would they care???

it seems like a void
waking up trapped inside
should i live another day?
should i rather die?

would they know im gone?
would they feel bad??
would they miss me forever?
or will it pass like a fad?

surely they will move on
thats how life works
but they wont be Able to replace me
they should miss my quirks

but is this life worth living??
i ponder deep and within
wat would i Accomplish
if i committed the lethal sin???

the train moves in rythm
the tracks they hypnotise
if i just fell
a decision, is it wise?

the thought grows on me 
"move back!" yells a voice
mind snaps from d trance
"you insane? do u wana die????"

"sorry" a feeble voice says
as my feet moves to safety
heart now pumps with fear
there was some concerned with my sanity

somebody did care if i was gone
flashes of moments lashed 
there was happiness in life too
there were times i had laughed!

there were beautiful moments too
like that kiss under d rain
was i willing to let all go
was it enough to refrain?

what will it be worth?
are these problems really grave???
"yes" the voice whispered
"it going to get worse they say"

but surely there will be happiness too
even though its hard to see
it is difficult to live happy
but is worth the seek

"do you need help?" my mom asked
as i sat blank on the chair
"yes, can we talk?" i asked
pulling a strand of my hair

"whats bothering you? ,
tell me im here.."
"i dont kno ma! 
all i feel is fear!"

"some days seem bright
the most are dark
the reality is dim
the thoughts are stark!"

"there is nothing wrong
still it feels that way
a vicious cycle
a violent sea without a bay"

"did something trigger?"
she spoke alarmed
"i cant remember,
its been too long..."

"why din you tell me?"
"i thought it was a phase
i thought i could cope
but i live in a sad daze"

"you need help baby
the professional kind"
"am i crazy?"
"no baby but we cant be blind"

"You are right it is a phase,
but it wont help with the stay
times will get better 
with help on its way..."