The Pugs and the Siamese

 

The Pugs and the Siamese

Were having a war

Identical to the one they’d had

2 years before.

The Siamese spat and hissed

And the Pugs barked and yapped

It was ever thus between dogs and cats.

Now the Siamese were sneaky

And the Pugs were determined

But there are no winners in wars

Of that I am certain.

The Siamese held the town

In a fierce some grip

Whilst the Pugs watched intently

For their guard to slip.

The Siamese laced dog biscuits

With Vodka and rum

And the Pug who ate all of them

Had an evening of fun.

He swayed and he sashayed

Till his paws were danced sore

Then he did two back somersaults

And lay dead on the floor!

For Pugs are no drinkers

As every Siamese knows

It goes straight to their heads

Then they curl up their toes.

The Pugs they riposted

With a Trojan cat

They filled it with fleas

And a Fox in a hat.

The Fox ran wild and the Siamese fled

Whilst scratching all over

Until raw and red.

The Pugs victorious strolled into the town

But the fleas got them too

And they soon turned around.

The town now free of tyrannical pets

Paid a fortune for flea killer

To an out of town vets.

The Fox he was feted

And appointed town mayor

And for all that I know

He still resides there.

A hero for our age

A bringer of peace

And I know this tale

As I married his niece.