He thinks she’s great but she’s a cheap shot slag

Leaves my flat smelling like a tranny’s handbag

Since upgrading to a D cup she’s far from shy

Put your silicone away Love, you’ll have out my eye

This image of his perception is a total farse

She’s even rougher than SuBo’s arse

I want to be wing girl and set him up with a beauty

I miss us high fiving when he scores with a cutey

She stays over again cause she ‘can’t afford to get back’

 He says he doesn’t want sex... she sleeps showing her crack

She’s on repeat that she’s been hurt before

I’m engrossed in a script but she’s hard to ignore

She opens her mouth with a barking sound

I await her pissing on his leg to mark her ground

So when he asks me what I think I’ll be as honest as I can

‘Get the fuck out before there’s a bunny in a saucepan’.