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Long for Silence

Why does my mind torture me so?

Why must it drown me in such cruelty?

“You’re not needed”

“You’re not wanted”

“You are nothing but a burden”

“That’s why you’ve lost so much”

“That’s why everyone left before and why they will leave again”

…please…stop…

I just want the voices to stop

They’ve grown so loud I cannot hear anything else

Even sleep provides no rest from their poisonous words

It’s worse when I sleep

For that’s when I’m trapped in their reality

They’re stronger

It’s not just whispers but a world created for me to live through my worst

fears on loop

Exploring every dark crevice of my mind

I long for the day when my smile reaches my heart and is more than just a painted mask to keep the questions away

🌷(1)

2018

◄ The Sweetest Lies

I long to surrender my heart ►

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