A teenage urge
Is to be revealed
For the first time tonight
rubbing the pillow
I have outgrown that
My strong hand has automatically
Become directed
I have corrected the technique
13 years are about to unleash
a one way ticket

The anticipation
Of the turning page
That one stuck
From the previous eruption
Enraged
May I ?
May I introduce my favourite glue
find your skin
In this fantasy world
A globule
Of white ink
And gloss sheen
Salty chemical bleachy scent
Milky fluid I became hell bent
Of first time movement
And fifty knuckle shuffles

but don’t make us go blind
guilt a huge machine
guilt a killer queen of me
instilled by the prudish
yet ironic
we all got born
from the sexual cocktail tonic
so why
why the speck in the eye weeps
when I stash porn under sheets
guilt only knows

don’t make me bad for being a bloke
do not forge the future mould
or shatter the fragile yoke
of development
through guilt

I only want some fun
You designed my body
How dare you be the shoddy one
When it comes to glamour
god only wear a tunic or a tornequee
Anyway
So don’t judge or blame me for nudity
In my private bathroom moment
Or under the cover torch yielding

The itch you can’t scratch
Master it
Debate it
You may celebrate sexuality
But bugger the feeling guilty
Bit
Take image in hand

Get on with it.
.