Portia knows that life is a pain.

Just having been out shopping again.

It is a nasty continuous round, of

Doing boring things in the kitchen.

Peter comes home from his tedious job.

He cannot help thinking that Portia's a slob.

She's scruffy and tired and, all of the time,

Doing boring things in the kitchen.

Portia peels spuds during GMTV,

While the window cleaner sees what he can see.

He taps on the window distracting her from,

Doing boring things in the kitchen.

Patrick comes in and he tickles her fancy.

She loves his cuddles and feels all romancy.

Now Portia and Patrick, engrossed in each other, are

Doing boring things in the kitchen.