Move your sweet lips closer to the microphone

And admit this second chance you’ve also blown

You should concede you have indeed made a poor show

Admit defeat; (best not to bleat)

You’ll have to go.

 

We were presented with a choice of the Hard Left

So let Boris get away with daylight theft

The Right now cackle at his debacle; they jibe and crow

He’s brought us tears for five more years-

He’ll have to go.

 

How could we spurn those many warnings that your feet

Would never tread the shag-pile rug of Downing Street?

The party whips say leadership’s an all-time low

So take with you McDonnell too-

He’ll have to go.

 

Won’t you say those words we long to hear

That it’s time for you to scram?

It’s best that you should disappear

To make your damson jam.

 

Tell us that you aren’t the leader that we seek

You lacked the skills, charisma too and you were weak

Despite this rout you’re without doubt an Honest Joe

Like Michael Foot, your soulmate, but-

He had to go.