I long for contentment. 
I just want to be happy, 
Is that too much wish for? 
Am tired of crying myself to sleep 
Am sick of the loneliness I once welcomed and now can't pull myself out of. 
The misery of noone getting me and everyone thinking am messed up. 
Maybe I am, 
But does that mean that am doomed to eternal sadness, loneliness, emptiness and self loathing? 
Sometimes I just wish for a friend, 
But even that the universe can't grant me. 
I move through the motions of life thinking fate and destiny always finds a way, 
Seems they lost their compass
And the worst part is
Am too big of a coward to end it on my terms
And so I suffer and wait for when my spirit will be too crushed to care
And maybe then fate will intervene.