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Ian Whiteley

Wed 15th May 2013 18:59

I will enter something official for this shortly Isobel - but here's a haiku for a bit of fun:

Fifty Two Hurts

I sang you that song
every week for a year
and still I’m alone…..

those who have heard my sound samples will understand :-)

Comment is about 52 Hertz (blog)

Original item by Isobel

Uschi Wheeler

Wed 15th May 2013 15:36

"Mad Experiment" sounds like a fantastic concept!
My first language is German but I write poetry in English. At school I was fascinated how well Shakespeare translated, to the point of suspecting an underlying conspiracy.
I have six publications to show for and had an article about rhyme published in the October issue of WOL.
If I can help, I'm up for it!

Uschi Wheeler

Comment is about Mad experiment on Write Out Loud – translating poems online! (article)

Original item by Julian Jordon

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David Blake

Wed 15th May 2013 15:03

I may well enter this one :)

Comment is about 52 Hertz (blog)

Original item by Isobel

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M.C. Newberry

Wed 15th May 2013 15:00

First - thanks for your kind comment on my last post.
"We laugh...we jest...
To forestall the final rest!"
Second: love your line "I'm glummer than a raindrop falling on a hearse" (above) in a very funny poem. Priceless!

Comment is about George Stanworth (poet profile)

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Richard

Wed 15th May 2013 14:53

Hi Gemma I like this very much, its harsh but so poetic and invokes a perfect sense of the place, nice )

Comment is about Bury Market (blog)

Original item by Gemma Lees

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Nigel Astell

Wed 15th May 2013 13:24

Hot kitten
Sexual appetite
lover's dream
uncertain future
means that
it will
broken again
and again
and again.

Comment is about Morning Shower (blog)

Original item by Katy Megan

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Nigel Astell

Wed 15th May 2013 13:10

Slight Drawback

Heaton Arts
lady designer
foreign translation
Julian explains
blue trousers
golfer gear
political split
why not!
french poem
ohh lala
doctor ambushed
badly beaten
varied selection
fine poetry
only one
slight drawback
no time
collage poem.

Comment is about Stockport WoL (group profile)

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Harry O'Neill

Wed 15th May 2013 12:36

Yvonne,
That bloody Coopey feller again!...He gets all of them!...It`s the youth, isn`t it...and the guitar?...that sound you can hear is my teeth grinding...all four of them.

Comment is about A poet at prayer (blog)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

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Richard

Wed 15th May 2013 12:33

Hi Ann I really enjoyed Breathing, for me the sound of the words almost made me lose sight of the meaning, if that makes sense wonderful )

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

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Richard

Wed 15th May 2013 12:24

Hey John kind words as ever, the picture is the profile one) its a beautiful painting, of for me a beautiful place

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Jon

Wed 15th May 2013 11:28

Thought your Blackpool poem had gone mate,was looking for it then found it here.'Sweet smell from pink hair to eat.Clowns of glass,elephants and rock.' Love it,but didnt it have a posting of its own with the brill pic?
I could taste the candyfloss,feel its sticky sweetness as I read this.'Charm,romance,beauty!nostalgia'

Comment is about Richard Alfred (poet profile)

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Jon

Wed 15th May 2013 11:22

Great poem Richard,sad/heartbreaking but full of depth and experience.

Comment is about Cruel Impossible Love (blog)

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garside

Wed 15th May 2013 09:11

thunder-inward
cosmos needle points
of angry miracles

like this very much

Comment is about Eye (blog)

Original item by Marianne Daniels

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Graham Sherwood

Tue 14th May 2013 22:42

What a very clever form this takes Tommy, really, really innovative, the sort of thing you wish you'd done yourself. Well done! Left frustratingly hanging. Graham

Comment is about 00:01 (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

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Richard

Tue 14th May 2013 19:58

I like this very much Lynn I have a real love for green fields and golden meadows and I know it twists at the end but it still invokes beautiful imagery on a personal level for me :)


Comment is about perspective (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

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Ian Whiteley

Tue 14th May 2013 19:08

Thanks for your kind comments on 'eyrie avenue' jonnie - glad you liked it - i hope it stayed just on this side of eerie - and the pay-off is the thought of what/who else is behind those other twitching curtains.
You know - I'd never even thought about the dual connotation of 'horny' and now I do I want to change it :-)
Cheers
Ian

Comment is about Jonnie Falafel (poet profile)

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attila the stockbroker

Tue 14th May 2013 19:08

I'd be well up for doing something too. They are fracking here in West Sussex...

Comment is about Whole lot of shaking going on: poets join fight against fracking (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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Ian Whiteley

Tue 14th May 2013 19:01

thanks for commenting on 'eyrie avenue' Yvonne - it's an older poem of mine and the characters are actual people - glad you liked it
Ian

Comment is about Yvonne Brunton (poet profile)

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Paul Sands

Tue 14th May 2013 17:48

Thank you for the encouraging words Jonnie

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Greg Freeman

Tue 14th May 2013 17:35

Do watch the video! There's a bit of everything at Sunday Xpress, it seems. It's not just poetry, it's true; but listening to the stories unfold in this very enjoyable piece of film, this venue in Brum does seem to have many typical characteristics - and characters - that Write Out Louders will recognise. And, as Brendan says, it keeps him out of the bookies.

Comment is about Poetry and all that jazz: Birmingham's Sunday Xpress at Adam & Eve (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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George Stanworth

Tue 14th May 2013 14:56

IKEA is brilliant. Haven't laughed so much for a long time. Very funny.

Comment is about John Coopey (poet profile)

Original item by John Coopey

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George Stanworth

Tue 14th May 2013 14:53

Love the satire. These are my kind of poems. Superb.

Comment is about Your First Hut Is The Cheapest (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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George Stanworth

Tue 14th May 2013 14:52

I like the dark humour. Very witty.

Comment is about THE MAGICAL MEDICAL MERRY-GO-ROUND (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

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George Stanworth

Tue 14th May 2013 14:49

Very original. Enjoyed this. Love your style.

Comment is about 00:01 (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

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Isobel

Tue 14th May 2013 12:49

Thanks for commenting on my old coat Lynn - yes it's one that I think would appeal to women more than men - I do believe that we feel things differently at times.

Any chance of a poem from you on the 52 Hertz theme? x

Comment is about Lynn Dye (poet profile)

Original item by Lynn Dye

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Ian Whiteley

Tue 14th May 2013 12:41

Thanks Richard & Isobel
it was written as an homage to Poe, so I'm so so glad that Richard picked up on that :-)
I write short stories Isobel, usually Magic Realism, Horror or fantasy - and this was adapted from one of those.
I love the idea that the clowns claim back their murderers by taking them into the caravan and painting them up to become one of them. A twisted revenge - who do you feel sorry for - the kids or the clowns????
mwuhaaahaaahaaahaaah!

Comment is about That Which Autumn Leaves (blog)

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Isobel

Tue 14th May 2013 12:35

I'm with Richard on clowns - I've always seen them as potentially sad subjects - covering their sadness with the paint and farce - not really being heard or seen.

This poem makes for a macabre nightmare story though - the stuff you might see in a film. I suppose as soon as you don any disguise there is the potential for children not to see you as you are - human beings.

Interesting poem - where do you get your ideas from? Not from experience, let's hope ;)

Comment is about That Which Autumn Leaves (blog)

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Isobel

Tue 14th May 2013 12:26

This just brought a great big smile to my face :)

Please don't consider it a tit for tat comment - though I'm grateful for yours on my coat poem. I just love the humour in this - the way your lofty, dreamy language leads to that punch line. I think it's very skilfully done - and a sad but funny reflection on reality :)

Comment is about perspective (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

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Richard

Tue 14th May 2013 12:09

Very good this, it for sure appeals to me, its funny, on a personal level I don't find clowns fearful at all I find them sad and wonderful but so many people think they are a thing of nightmares. This reads like something Poe might of wrote.....love it

Comment is about That Which Autumn Leaves (blog)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

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Lynn Dye

Tue 14th May 2013 11:17

Thank you Francine, gratifying to know :-)

Comment is about perspective (blog)

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Lynn Dye

Tue 14th May 2013 11:16

Hi Isobel, I really love this poem. It works so well on different levels, and definitely one I easily associate with. xx

Comment is about A day in the life of... an old coat (blog)

Original item by Isobel

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Jonnie Falafel

Tue 14th May 2013 10:01

The samples were speriamo good I had a scoot through the list. Wonderful stuff. Midnight Bird struck a chord. One thing i notice where i live now is the absence of light pollution. You can see the bands of the Milky Way when there are no clouds. I also thought of the way humans change the ecology of natural habitats. The foxes in British towns and the bears in Canada.

Loved Remembrance to. Very poignant.

Comment is about Paul Sands (poet profile)

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Martin Peacock

Tue 14th May 2013 00:35

Hut's the way (uh-huh uh-huh) I like it (uh-huh uh-huh)...

Comment is about Your First Hut Is The Cheapest (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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Martin Peacock

Tue 14th May 2013 00:30

Cheers for the comments re: The Writing Class me hearty. I'm not much of an Abba fan either (can't you just tell there's a bad joke about Scandiwegian vegetables dying to come forward right about now?)

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Martin Peacock

Mon 13th May 2013 22:07

Cheers for the comments Johnnie. Me too: I love the discipline of tight rhythm and rhyme - it makes me think about my native language in an expansive way. Although I write in free verse too I believe that one shouldn't think of oneself as a poet until structured poetry has been...well, if not mastered then at least taken to task. Is that a contradictory principle for a revolutionary socialist to hold? I can picture many poets thinking me a reactionary fuddy duddy for holding that opinion, but I'd argue that I simply love my craft, this artistic enterprise called poetry too much to be slipshod, to settle for 'just' or 'always' writing free.

Comment is about Jonnie Falafel (poet profile)

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Francine

Mon 13th May 2013 21:55

I could visualise this all the way through!

Comment is about perspective (blog)

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Isobel

Mon 13th May 2013 21:54

After shock would work well too. I tried to explain that expression earlier. After pain resonates more for me because it relates to childbirth - it's about pain rather than shock - after pains are like contractions - very very painful and they strike right at the core of you.

In a way, poems are like babies, you give birth to them and then you outgrow them - or maybe they outgrow you.

Thanks for reading - I appreciate it.

Comment is about A day in the life of... an old coat (blog)

Original item by Isobel

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Isobel

Mon 13th May 2013 21:50

LOL - everything you've said would be supported by very many people on WOL. You should check out the discussion thread on 'sentimentality', which wandered down that very same route.

There are the right wing extremists who believe that free verse isn't poetry, there are the left wing extremists who believe that ancient rules strangle the essence of poetry and there are the liberals, who believe that knowledge of rules is preferable, even if they aren't adhered to...

Those classifications are just me poking fun of course. There are probably plenty more you could think up. I've written a few poems in strictly metred format. I enjoyed them as an exercise but like to try my hand at free verse now. It's incredibly hard for me to do free verse though. My musical ear want it to flow - and it's a lot harder to write flowing poetry without rhyme - which leads me to abandoning lots of poems.

Rhyming poetry doesn't seem to win many poetry comps though, if you take a look around at what is flavour of the day... Not that that bothers me cos I don't enter them - it's just an indication of where contemporary poetry is going.

Best get off before I end up writing an essay :)

Comment is about Richie Muster (poet profile)

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Martin Peacock

Mon 13th May 2013 21:43

Hmm. An evocative and thought-provoking poem Isobel. Poems do have the unsettling habit of reminding us of our former selves don't they? Might it be better ended by changing 'after pain' to 'aftershock'?

Comment is about A day in the life of... an old coat (blog)

Original item by Isobel

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Martin Peacock

Mon 13th May 2013 21:34

Well thanky kindly for your comment on 'The Writing Class', Isobel. Oddly enough it didn't take as long to write as it did to polish up. Shaving off the rough burrs and embellishing it took much longer! I lament the fact that not much rhymed poetry gets written these day: I get the impression that, for many free verse is the default option, to the detriment of good poetic style and construction. I'd be interested in your opinion on this: all I see around me is prose poetry (of which I'm not averse - I write quite a bit myself) which ought to be but one weapon in a poet's arsenal, not the be all and end all. Perhaps I'm an anachronism, but I believe that a budding poet oughtn't to write free until they've mastered structure. Is that contentious do you think?

Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)

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winston plowes

Mon 13th May 2013 21:30

Brilliant news Frances

Comment is about Write Out Loud's reviews editor wins poetry award (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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winston plowes

Mon 13th May 2013 21:29

Great to see so many familiar names of Wolers in here :-) Well done all!

Comment is about Write Out Loud poets line up with famous names in Heart Shoots charity anthology (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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Isobel

Mon 13th May 2013 21:21

Thanks Alex/Francine - the proof of the pudding is in the eating. Let's see whether it takes off as a theme. I hope it does as I'd like to see what people make of it. There's sometimes no accounting for what people want to write about though. x

Comment is about 52 Hertz (blog)

Original item by Isobel

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Isobel

Mon 13th May 2013 21:02

I like this Harry - it's a well observed piece. It's funny how such moments can live with you for a lifetime - you capture it well.

Comment is about SIN AGAINST THE SPIRIT? (blog)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

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Harry O'Neill

Mon 13th May 2013 20:26


One more (revised) re-post from my accidently wiped profile.

Comment is about SIN AGAINST THE SPIRIT? (blog)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

Graham Chadwick

Mon 13th May 2013 19:49

dear Yvonne

That's amazingly generous of you. I'll study yours hard and see what comes out. Must study use of reflexive.

I'm hoping that trying to write in French will help the compression process leaving me with "impressions" I believe Sam Beckett wrote in French for this reason - amongst others.

Meanwhile I'm having an additional bathroom installed next week and hope poets will drop in - all WOLs welcome.

Graham

Comment is about TRANSPOECY (blog)

Original item by Graham Chadwick

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Yvonne Brunton

Mon 13th May 2013 19:22

Dream on! I would have volunteered for the job but J. C.'s already offered me the position of chief groupie. Oh, decisions, decisions!
However I still enjoy reading your poems and this has lots of lovely images.
XX

Comment is about A poet at prayer (blog)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

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Yvonne Brunton

Mon 13th May 2013 19:12

In the firebird how's about:-
Au tombé du jour au bord du Salagou
J’ai vu l’oiseau du feu.
Dans les plissements entre les ruffes rougeâtres
Il se nourrit des grains de météore.
Tout à coup il s’est envolé,
Sa voix, "Clic, clic, clic!"
Un compteur Geiger.


Sur les collines le vent ebbouriffe

les feuilles d'olivier

Les transformant aux ailes des anges.

dans le bleu une plume argentée

cherche à devenir nuage.

mais elle se réduit, se réduit, se réduit à néant,

mais, peut-être, une intimation d'un orage,

la crise terminale de la canicule/

Le bruit blanc des cigales s'arrete, marque une pause,

et recommence.

Je n'entends que leur silence.

Des gouses d'acanthe s'explosent et jettent

leurs balles, PING, sur le toit du fer

de notre terrasse

Des cloches de chèvre tintent, quelque part, quelque part?

Parmi les arbres crie une tronçonneuse, crie, et s'arrête.

Et en haut, le bourdonnement parasseux d'un avion.


French makes frequent use of the reflexive form of the verb when there is no direct object.
It was easier to cut, paste then alter the originals rather than discuss individual words - but these are only suggestions anyway.
I enjoyed both poems graham and I envy you living in Grance!

Comment is about TRANSPOECY (blog)

Original item by Graham Chadwick

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M.C. Newberry

Mon 13th May 2013 19:05

Hi Yvonne - I enjoyed your "like for like"
response on my last post (oops...sounds like I'm tempting providence...musically speaking!!)

Comment is about Yvonne Brunton (poet profile)

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Yvonne Brunton

Mon 13th May 2013 18:00

Quality stuff, this, John - unlike your first shed.
Ps can I have your old shed?

Comment is about Your First Hut Is The Cheapest (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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