Welcome to WOL Kristian! Look forward to reading more of your words. Good start by the way! I think a lot of people on here will relate to your poems. ?
Comment is about Kristian Deidre Brown (poet profile)
Original item by Kristian Deidre Brown
Welcome Kristian, You can make it better this time, or like whatever you make, better. I am glad you see the Sun, Has a new day begun?
Comment is about Different This Time (blog)
Original item by Kristian Deidre Brown
This really resonates with me, thank you!
Comment is about Eric, It Will Pass (blog)
Original item by Eric Berard
Thank you Julie, Vautaw & Stephen for the kind comments.
It was actually part of a much longer poem contrasting day & night, but I'd already 'nicked' most of the day part for other poems!
Glad you enjoyed it though.
And thanks for the Likes, Aisha, Holden, J.D. & Aviva ?
Comment is about Night-time Serenade (blog)
Original item by Stephen W Atkinson
In a colourful way I think you have revealed an aspect of human nature that can be unhelpful at best and destructive at worst Aviva. Sparing the time in your line indicates caring enough for the truth , but closed minds are the danger !
Good writing I reckon.
Ray
Comment is about Imagine All The People... (blog)
Original item by Aviva Rifka Bhandari
Thank you Stephen. Your comments are always so thoughtful and generous.
Funnily enough this morning when I posted it I couldn't recall the logic of the harsh desert, I decided to post it anyway thinking to trust my original inspiration this once.. now I remember which type of egg timer I was referring to and it all makes sense to me again. ?
But humorous anecdote aside, this is quite a harsh and difficult poem and I wasn't sure if anyone would like it. That being said, thanks also to everyone who has encouraged me by clicking 'Like' for the poem!
Comment is about Imagine All The People... (blog)
Original item by Aviva Rifka Bhandari
Thanks for the likes, Holden, Stephen and JD. Thanks also for the comments, glad you stuck it out to the final verse!
Comment is about The Wheel Of Lockdown (blog)
Original item by julie callaghan
Thank you for your recent response to my comments, it was really kind and I doubt I deserve the praise but it was so nice to know that I haven't wrong-stepped too much here at WOL as I really value your writing and character and want to continue in our acquaintance that I'd like to hope will head towards friendship over time. ?
Comment is about J.D. Bardo (poet profile)
Original item by J.D. Bardo
This is inspiring and empowering. ?
Comment is about Flash your Sign (blog)
Original item by J.D. Bardo
The imagery in this poem is wonderful, and so many powerful lines.
The last verse nails it.
Comment is about Imagine All The People... (blog)
Original item by Aviva Rifka Bhandari
Yes, this is riveting stuff. Beautiful.
Comment is about Night-time Serenade (blog)
Original item by Stephen W Atkinson
I love the way the last verse finishes on an optimlistic note. Yes, there is hope.....
Last year I remember writing:
The virus, apogee of crime,
Lengthens our days but steals our time
Comment is about The Wheel Of Lockdown (blog)
Original item by julie callaghan
If you’ve got Amazon Prime I’d recommend watching Searching for Sugar man (a 1 episode documentary on Ramirez and his rather surprising story...)
Comment is about Nostalgia and I (blog)
Original item by Xoanxo
JD.,
In an increasingly troubled world where even the pandemic has become the subject of adversarial politics, this poem speaks of peace. What a sign of hope this poem gives.
Thank you for this
Keith
Comment is about Flash your Sign (blog)
Original item by J.D. Bardo
This poem is magical Stephen. I shall return to read it again and again on starless nights.
Comment is about Night-time Serenade (blog)
Original item by Stephen W Atkinson
Hugh. I am glad the song reminded you of what was, I hope, a happy childhood.
Comment is about Gorffwysfa* (blog)
Original item by John E Marks
This is a beautiful message that the whole world needs to see J.D.! ?
Comment is about Flash your Sign (blog)
Original item by J.D. Bardo
WOW, Great job again, the last stanza really feels good. and a Rockin` Rhyme also. thanks Julie.
Comment is about The Wheel Of Lockdown (blog)
Original item by julie callaghan
Thanks to everyone, one and all. and especially you Aviva, sincerely thank-you for participating, I am happy to see you on WOL regularly, and look forward to seeing your contributions. I like them all. (don`t change a one, once written, it is done). JD.
Comment is about A Guiding Star (blog)
Original item by J.D. Bardo
<Deleted User> (28781)
Sun 17th Jan 2021 15:12
Stephen, it's always a pleasure to get comments from writers whose work one admires.
Thanks to all.
Love and Peace
Comment is about WHO KILLED GEORGE FLOYD? (blog)
Original item by trevor homer
Replaced the tears in my eyes with stars, wonderful poem, thank you.
Comment is about Night-time Serenade (blog)
Original item by Stephen W Atkinson
I have missed reading your poems.
Comment is about Tortured Soul (blog)
Original item by curiousdud3
<Deleted User> (28781)
Sun 17th Jan 2021 12:42
May your face be light
And behind shadows you may never hide
From the dungeons and dug holes
May your soul rise and be purified
O the tortured tattered soul that cries
May healing touch you from the skies
Cleansing you of the darkness that you abide
See the beauty of the light and shun the old grabs of weakness and lies
You need to shine and throw away your dark sides
From the world May you never have to hide
Keeping your identity obscured
Hiding behind vile masks that ain't yours
May healing be upon the tortured souls.?
Comment is about Tortured Soul (blog)
Original item by curiousdud3
Thank-you Hugh, I did not get this at first, until I realized that sit rhymes with, - - - -, thanks again Hugh. A thinker, and a stinker.
Comment is about A deaf dog blog (blog)
Original item by hugh
Dacw nghariad i lawr yn y berllan.
'Rwyn cofio canu'r gan hon yn yr ysgol ym Mhontarddulais pan oeddwn yn fachgen bach.
Comment is about Gorffwysfa* (blog)
Original item by John E Marks
A double treat! Thanks for introducing me to Ramirez. Listening to his tunes now. Love Heaven & Hurricane. Smooth grooves.
Comment is about Nostalgia and I (blog)
Original item by Xoanxo
Sun 17th Jan 2021 03:00
thanks for the compliment Aviva.
you are too kind.
Comment is about Aviva Rifka Bhandari (poet profile)
Original item by Aviva Rifka Bhandari
Thank you very much Vautaw! Written while listening on a loop to "I Think of you" by Ramirez (Searching for Sugar Man)
Comment is about Nostalgia and I (blog)
Original item by Xoanxo
Thank YOU Keith for your understanding. Understanding is a rare commodity in these days. We have left the eastern orthodox Christians to persecution and genocide from militant Islam for over a thousand years. WE are no longer a Christian society if we turn our backs on our brothers and then complain about terrorism in the west. I am ashamed.
Comment is about 29 May 1453 - 11 September 2001 (blog)
Original item by John E Marks
Wow! Stunning poetry Xoanxo. Thank you for lighting up a dark world. ❤️
Comment is about Nostalgia and I (blog)
Original item by Xoanxo
Love this poem J.D. Thank you for sharing your God-given gift. ❤
Comment is about A Guiding Star (blog)
Original item by J.D. Bardo
A lament with a foreboding sense of continuing destruction wrought from a pristine beauty in an age of glory. St Sophia's Cathedral, the victim of secular sacrilege, made into a museum and now given into the hands of the conqueror. All within a short distance of the Ecumenical Patriarch who presides over an empty seminary once the home of many whose lives were committed to Christ. A quiet conspiracy to oversee the final vestiges of an ancient Christian Community into barbaric hands
A lament indeed. Thank you for this as sad as it is.
Keith
Comment is about 29 May 1453 - 11 September 2001 (blog)
Original item by John E Marks
Thank you so much Aviva and Keith, I genuinely don't know what to say. Such high praise, and honestly, I genuinely wasn't sure about this one, I nearly deleted it because I didn't think I was getting it right. And yes, you are of course right Aviva, there are plenty of things in life that make us cry because they happened and smile because they're gone, but over all, looking back on a life, good and bad, it's still better than not living at all. On balance I think that's probably right. We're tough, us humans, I think that's why we value meaning above all else. Only love comes close and to be fair, that's because it’s the most meaningful thing of all. Thank you both so much. ❤
J. x
Comment is about Don’t Cry (blog)
Original item by Jason Bayliss
<Deleted User> (18980)
Sat 16th Jan 2021 21:45
I was occupied with years of other things. I'm back here now to play.?
Comment is about Graham Sherwood (poet profile)
Original item by Graham Sherwood
This is so well constructed I can probably read it a dozen times in one sitting. I've already lost count of exactly how many times so far.
It has the standard of humorous and poetic genius as if it were from milliganimals
Comment is about What the...? (blog)
Original item by branwell kent
Thank you to those who have clicked 'Like' for this poem.
However, I have decided to make a change to the poem from how it was originally, the top two lines of the poem have been added. I was always slightly unsure of the abrupt ending and I feel that the top two lines provide better balance to naturalise the style of the ending.
Comment is about Whatever You Do (blog)
Original item by Aviva Rifka Bhandari
I especially liked 'cheered on by by a hundred browning hulls
stranded among weeds either side.' as it formed a kind of crescendo from where you were perhaps the only one noticing the adventurous leaf, to suddenly a myriad of attention from even more interested observers.
It's uplifting and inspiring to be reminded how just one tiny detail, given enough attention, can be transformational if we can see it as such.
There's also a kind of analogy that we are each like the leaf floating along a stream on an uncertain but hopeful journey.
Comment is about Birdsong Resumes (blog)
Original item by Adam Whitworth
A very fine, powerful poem.
Comment is about WHO KILLED GEORGE FLOYD? (blog)
Original item by trevor homer
Thanks for your thoughts, Ray. I saw it at Pickering on the North York’s Moors Railway where I am a shareholder. They don’t exactly doff their caps to me but it’s nice to know I’m doing a bit to help.
And thanks for the Like, Stephen G and Branwell.
Comment is about 60103 (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
It's a very good cause for a whine
With the news as it is at this time
That as a parent solo
There's no time for yolo
And I can't even relax with wine.
Comment is about Chillax (blog)
Original item by Trevor Alexander
Absolutely I agree you should leave it as you intend it and my reference to a wide audience of people who would like it better that way implied this. I stated that I agree with Keith on purpose to show that I agree with everything he said (including that it is a good poem and a lesson, and we are all offering something unique, etc) - basically I did as much as possible to show that I do know you should keep this poem as you intend whilst still representing what I do and don't like about it. I could have not commented at all but I wanted to show support for everything else that it says so well whilst not misrepresenting myself either.
Comment is about A Guiding Star (blog)
Original item by J.D. Bardo
JD.,
Your reply to Aviva's constructive criticism really hits the mark. I believe firmly in God, yet I accept there are those who don't. So be it. You are the author of this poem and despite the value of constructive criticism your integrity is at stake. I would leave this poem exactly as you have written it, not to do so would impair its authenticity.
Keith
Comment is about A Guiding Star (blog)
Original item by J.D. Bardo
Aviva, I respect your opinion on my poem, I did read it with that line removed, it did not rhyme correctly. Also with the line removed it is not the poem that I created, nor would it reflect my belief in there being a God, and my freedom to express that belief in my poetry. I could change it, but then it becomes your poem. JD.
Comment is about A Guiding Star (blog)
Original item by J.D. Bardo
I agree with Keith but I could almost wish that the line 'If you can be happy with the "you" that God has made.' were not there because I agree entirely with the rest of the poem but I am just not someone who thinks God has anything to do with the final outcome of things - might not even exist at all.
But there is a huge audience of people who adore references to God's overseeing powers and don't find any contradiction in bemoaning people's behaviours whilst simultaneously claiming god was the joyous cause of everything that happens.
Incidentally the poem works really well without that line since an almost identical sentiment (except for the god reference) is in the line 'If you have confidence and acceptance in yourself.'
Comment is about A Guiding Star (blog)
Original item by J.D. Bardo
John Coopey
Mon 18th Jan 2021 08:41
Thanks for the Likes, Aviva,, JD, Stephen A and Kristian.
Comment is about THE PLATES OF SANDWICHES (blog)
Original item by John Coopey