Thanks for your kind comments and critique.
Robert: I've added another short poem, which I hope you'll like. If you're interested in reading more you can always order a copy of my debut book from The Penniless Press Publications (forgive the cheap plug!).
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Original item by Susan Darlington
Love the style of the samples on your profile - any chance of posting more? I appreciate your 'observant' attention to detail and careful choice of vocabulary. There is a certain economy of words that indicates a deliberation of thought and a striving for the end product to be as good as it can be. Thank you for sharing.
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<Deleted User> (13740)
Sat 18th Apr 2015 18:04
love your poetry :)
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Original item by Susan Darlington
Robert Mann
Thu 9th Jul 2015 00:30
Susan,
Sorry I missed your latest addition Beck (Stanza Stones) when you first posted it.
I like the concept of water and its cycle, providing growth and life before returning to its source, but I have to pick you up on a couple of things:
If water were 'common' currency, as opposed to rare, the grass would not be parched. Perhaps valued currency would be more apt unless the common you refer to is the land itself.
Salty bullets and pearl necklaces conjure up images I'm not sure you intended and will have some people sniggering!
Please take my comments in the way of constructive criticism as I enjoy your words immensely.
Comment is about Susan Darlington (poet profile)
Original item by Susan Darlington