In the grate, the shivering flames
hungrily wrap their lips around logs
The boards above me creek
my wife haunting somewhere
the baby's hands reach out
wave before its sleeping eyes

The wind is howling...

The smiles on our faces as we galloped down the aisle
making sense of scattered photograph moments
but I can't remember why
can't think of anything but waiting
and doing everything...

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I am so very exhausted
I tried everything,  I really did
Still this darkness looms over me
Making the love and happiness hard to see
Everything is impossible to try to reach
This constant fight drains me like a leach
My limbs are so heavy, I can hardly move
Bouts of energy come far too little, and far too few
So I'm stuck in this position, as if I'm glued
And no this isn't the type of day...

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Would you believe me

If I told you the truth

Would you stay with me,

Or would you just leave?

Would you still feel 

The way that you do

If you saw me kneel

Before the demons so cruel?

I tried to escape

But it fell right through

It was never fate

What should I do?

I didn't mean to fail 

I did choose you

But the monsters fight

Harder than I'm able to

I...

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Give me a broken mirror.

Hide the blemishes and blotches

That impairs and disfigures.

Give me renewed youth.

Re-circuit my memory

Rewrite the truth.

Give me made up days.

Turn action to fiction

Blow my mind away.

Give me turning tides.

Give me caves and crevices

In which I can hide.

Give me light, give me dark

Give me dressings to hide

...

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You try to escape the demons

But they latch on way too tight,

Their claws digging into my body

And mind, with all their might.

Fighting is exhausting,

It physically and mentally drains.

But still I endure it, hoping

One day I will finally escape the pain.

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I'm sitting here, trapped, frozen in time

Head imploding, finally losing my mind

Nowhere to run, bound and confined

To the prison within, my unconscious mind.

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Each day, more exhausting than the last.

Time goes far too slowly, or too fast.

you're either extremely low, or elevated.

People either love you, or you're hated.

There is no middle ground

- no inbetween.

Everything is one extreme.

you're either Jekyll or you're Hyde.

It is a never ending fight.

You're a walking contradiction ,

With no explanation,

No cha...

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(I have written this piece to help you understand Bipolar Disorder, (and my writing) a mental illness little understood by the general community. 1 in 50 Australians suffer from this illness. I am one of those 50.)

I'm bipolar. Some say keep it private. Go public ?

What ever are you thinking of !

My response? How can you be expected to understand

this mental illness if it's n...

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Last Night

…(gemma)...Gemma…

    “Gemma!”  She snapped into consciousness, only partly.  Her head was pounding and her fingers felt swollen.

    “What time is it?” she murmured.  Her eyelids remained heavy still, but they opened wide enough to notice the thin rays of light streaming through the dorm room’s blinds.  Gemma shifted her body to face Alex.  He looked almost as groggy as s...

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25/10/11

So unpredictable.

So sharp and so cunning

Is the pain that run through me,

Hideous yet so stunning.

I want to keep it here, 

I want to feel it's cold aching

Blood spilling from me

My heart is still breaking

What if I want it to stop?

Please, leave me alone!

It'll be there. Waiting.

For me to decay down to bones. 

Maybe that's what I wa...

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