I admit, dying
I've been thinking about dying a lot recently. Not because I think I would ever actually have the courage to do something to take my own life. But because I'm confused on where to go from here. Life is about new adventures, finding yourself, loved ones and making the most of it. Where do you go when you find nothing from living fulfilling, thats usually when you can say you'd be okay with dying, right? It's confusing on where to adventure, where to find new hobbies or people to meet when you don't want any of it. You don't want life. What happens when your mind tapes out before your body. Before your body even got to get to the age where bones start to feeling brittle and eye sights are slowly taken. Where do you go from there? I can't even think about anything in life that exciting anymore, so where did I lose it? When did I go from a young soul willing to do and take any adventure because "live life to the fullest you only have one!" To a soul who could have all her dreams and wishes come true tomorrow and it still wouldn't be enough to make me see life again. Where do I go from there? I think dying mentally and being forced to still live is so much harder than just dying. Theres a whole world in front of me, and I want none of it. I seek none of it, I feel none of it. So what's left besides the last final part, dying.
Aviva Rifka Bhandari
Thu 11th Feb 2021 19:20
What's left besides the last final part... quite a lot, but until you can decide what that is for you, write lots of poetry. ?