They called him Lusty Les, the tradesman who ran round the ‘bare it all’ beaches of Cornwall,
naked but for an Arabian fez, and wielding a spanner, his favourite tool.

He wanted the female bathers to see his muscled body,
but they were all in the bar of the Old Cornwallians Women’s Rugby Club,
which had kindly let them use the showers, due to a plumbing emergency at the naturists’ camp,
even though the president Mrs Dashwood-Dalrymple was a confessed prude,
they laughed when he appeared with his spanner,
which he’d announced on the club’s Facebook page was his favourite implement,
and could fix any blockage, leak or plumbing appendage, clothed or nude.

When Les duly fixed the leaking faucet, the committee made him an honorary member
of this emerging women’s club, who loved to play rugby union football.

The women, led by feisty forward Bab's Boscombe, exclaimed ‘Les, you’re a fool!’

‘Oh,' he responded, 'I like to reveal most of everything, where it is appropriate,
but I dress up to watch you ladies play rugby football.’
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Now, many years later females are playing both rugby codes,
but when Old Cornwallians Women’s Rugby Club qualified to compete in the English Ladies Championship,
a last-minute drama threatened when the showers broke down and both teams refused to take the pitch.

When Les, a keen travelling fan, offered his services,
Major-General (retired) Gerald Gillinsgard dismissed him as a ‘fool’,
calling in his own man who’d served with him in The Welsh Guards,
known among his old pals as ‘Taff The Tap’.
But try as he might Taffy couldn’t resolve the problem, losing his temper and calling Les an ‘idiot’.

Then with the big game imminent, Lesley stepped up,
wielding his favourite tool to tweak the 'what you m’call’ it.

Now his memory is celebrated at that Cornish Women’s Rugby Club as the man,
known locally as ‘The fool with the tool’, now husband to Babs – the greatest female rugby player,
who’d ensured that she and her teammates, on that triumphant day at Twickenham – and I say this toungue in cheek
would have what all women must have after exercise (the ones I’d met anyway) – a hot shower.