Euro bosses and the Premier League

Have prostituted the game we love

To watch on the BBC and Sky TV,

Collapsed on the sofa with footie fatigue.

 

As our goalie dons his sponsored gloves,

They switch us to adverts from Bet 365,

“What are the odds, now, that Leeds will survive?”

 

What price will be paid for Leeds going down,

In gate receipts and player recruitment?

No wonder our manager wears a frown,

Or a painted-on desmile, like a circus clown.

 

Relegation is confirmed, the game is lost,

But think of the money, guys, consider the cost!

 

Sponsorship deals will be put on hold,

Now there’s no Premier pot of gold.

Contract talks are held straight after the game,

Professional players feel no sense of shame!

Football, it's said, is a game of two halves,

So we should wave our credit cards,

Alongside our scarves!

 

 Advertising boards will be sparse and bare,

The players will have Poundland logos to wear!

But, parachute payments will keep soccer fair,

And our American owners will understand…

As Leeds seek a return to the Promised Land!

 

That’s it, then, our game is lost.

But how much will relegation cost?

Though our overpaid athletes

Should have shown greater will,

Our replica shirt sales will sweeten the pill!

The club shop can sell plastic souvenirs,

To commemorate ‘Relegation Year.’