The Dishonours List

or

The  Polishing & Flushing of Sundry Richard IIIrds on the 9th of June 2023

 

It’s said that he ran; or perhaps he was pushed?

Is the admiring herd now immune to his sleaze?

Will the Çee U Next Tuesdays be finally flushed?

Perchance we may dream of not swimming in fæces!

 

There’s a proverb of old:‘One can’t polish a turd’;

An impossible task-or so one might think!

But under Charles the Third, a miracle’s occurred,

From the cesspit is risen an historic old stink;

 

Honours for favours, now a debased currency,

Awarded to shit-flinging pantomime Dames,

Who’re woefully at odds with a suffering humanity;

Their legacy is ever more strife and more pain.

 

Their rallying cry sounds:‘We must stop the boats’,

(‘But we didn’t know they shot refugees in Rwanda’

They bullshit) whilst racially dog-whistling votes.

Lies, cruelty and ignorance are their Lingua Franca.

 

Yes,‘Read all about it!’ cries that sewer’s Daily Heil,

Who once loved to dance to Pinocchio’s tunes,

That paragon of veritable truth and of style,

A rag well-belovèd of the swivel-eyed loons.

 

‘Oh infamy, oh infamy, they’ve all got it infamy!’

The Turd-in-Chief weeps as he floats away.

Chez ‘Spoons now, the Unicorn steak’s gone Gammony,

The Uplands are enveloped in a Moggy foggy day.