(Actually, fellas, get yersens tested!)

 

Got to bed around half past 10

Tossed and turned for an hour and then

Lord, lord, it can’t have been the booze;

I’d not had a drink since half past three

Nonetheless I still needed a pee

Lord, lord, I got Enlarged Prostate Blues.

 

Back to bed till a quarter to 2

Then, bugger me! I’m gonna need the loo

Lord, lord, I got Enlarged Prostate Blues.

Once upon a time I was a right good shot

Nowadays I mostly miss the pot

Lord, lord, I got Enlarged Prostate Blues.

 

I can’t piss straight cos it sprays, I guess,

From East North East round to West North West

Lord, lord, I got Enlarged Prostate Blues.

It’s best these days at night I’ve found

To piss like a woman sat sitting down

Lord, lord, I got Enlarged Prostate Blues.

 

Up again at half past 3

You’ve guessed correct I need the lavatory

Lord, lord, I got Enlarged Prostate Blues.

I’m bursting to waz but the waz won’t come

For 10 minutes more I’m just sat on my bum

Lord, lord, I got Enlarged Prostate Blues.

 

Another one at 5 and then at half past 6

I envy you young ‘uns that can piss right quick

Lord, lord, I got Enlarged Prostate Blues.

Get up at 8 0’clock with a cup of decaf tea

The cycle starts again as I’m off for a pee

Lord, lord, I got Enlarged Prostate Blues.