My dearest darling Natalie
I really like your style
Your tenacity defending
This green and pleasant isle
Your hard line on asylum seekers
Coming over here
Our match was made in heaven
That’s obvious, my dear

We’re so alike, dear Natalie
It’s very plain to see
Your votes against equalities
And for Voter ID
Those rights for workers, I agree
Will really have to go
And never mind the mishap
Shame on you and P&O

Dear Natalie, you’re very right
As far as I can see
Nobody could question
Our compatibility
And it’s fair, dear Natalie
To tap up Honest Bob
Your sex pest ex’s sentence
Clearly was a stitch-up job

I’m so glad you crossed the floor
Natalie, my dear
Welcome to the party
With all my love
Sir Kier