(A rare love poem from Yours Truly)

I got Sunblest for my snap today

But if I protest I get it anyway

I hear you say

“Who is it treats me this way?”

Our Gert

I’m talking about Our Gert.

I like to see the sights when I’m on holiday

But she drags me round M&S and C&A.

I like to watch on TV Tottenham Hotspur play

But it’s “Friends” instead and not “Match of the Day”

I like to join the boys for beer on Saturday

But it’s “Paint the fence”, “Clean the car” I hear her say

She was so sweet at first but turned into Reggie Kray

But I wouldn’t swop her, I’d keep her come what may.