Sir Keir Starmer.

 

I got voted in by the public by a huge majority the largest majority in modern history, am I to take it the people of Britain really like me.

Or maybe there is another reason we haven't seen, some people say I got voted in because of hatred for the Tories, totally fed up with the conservatives for whatever reason it is I am now free to do as I choose, as many votes as we like in parliament we cannot lose.

I carefully managed and sold the country an illusion, now I can freely get back into bed with the unions.

I am like the Tories I have no real understanding of poverty, struggling to pay my bills has never really concerned me.

I am limited in creativity and personality, and I have very few policies, I know you would expect more from a public school educated man who attended university.

As a qualified and practising barrister, I should know and understand the truth, but I believe that doesn't apply to me only to you.

If I was being honest, I have no interest in the great British public, the decisions I make, whether they like them or not I don't really care, they will just have to put up with it.

The only thing I really care about is my ever-hungry ego and that power trip I am on, charging it regularly to keep it nice and strong.

I am a wolf in sheep’s clothing who has bluffed my way into power, underneath all the television front and media rhetoric I am a slimy 2 faced coward.

As the country falls gradually into even more despair, you will see me standing there with my cheesy smile pretending that I care.

After five years my ego will be fulfilled, and I will have my place in history, I can collect my over inflated pension and leave the mess I would have created all behind me.

As usual for me I can pass the blame onto other people for the state of the country and economy, i will no longer have to pretend i know what i am doing because the world would have already found out this is not the reality.

I will travel the world on my union paid holidays and will be able to forget the Great British public quite happily and easily.

 

Tobani August 2024.