I sipped my coffee in the morning,
I stared at him,
he stared at his phone,
I stared off into space.

Have you ever looked at your lover and wondered if you love him or why?
Ever wondered who he actually is when you hear him on the phone at night?
Have you ever looked at them and realized
why your heart sinks when he walks out the door without saying goodbye?
Have you ever felt your chest crumble when his phone vibrates and he turns it over?
And you turn over and face the wall in bed at night,
The silence says it all.

Sometimes I miss my father, so I find a lover and he treats me like my father did my mother.
With fury and passion and carelessness.
Sometimes wholeheartedly, sometimes with emptiness.

My lover is two or three people at the same time, 
My lover doesn't love me when I'm sad 
So I swallow my truth and tell my friends we're fine.
Sometimes I don't think he ever loved me at all.
He comes home smelling of crimes and poor.

I wash the day off with his dishes
and pack his lunch.
He packed my power in a suitcase and didn't come home.
He didn't say goodbye or explain why.
He didn't even leave a note.

But if you see my father, can you tell him I've been looking?
I keep thinking I've seen his face.
I wanted to ask him what's the trick
To make a man like him love me forever days
When I found him, he said, "Oh, my child."
He brushed his hand over my face.
He looked at me with sad eyes and said,
"The trick is to run away."