GSOH

 

 

Find Love! the  DreamMatch™ site enticed

And the girls in Sales had twittered and cajoled

Oh Derek it will be so much fun

To meet that Soulmate, that Special One. 

Oh Good God Derek ! Forget the cost!

And find Sunsets and Laughter, The Smile You’ve Lost.

The Woman of his Dreams  he guessed did not come cheap.

 

He agonised for seven days, and now, he wondered if despair

Had a scent so strong her nose would twitch, and  where

As compliments rehearsed, fell frozen from his mouth

And clattered to his plate, she’d read between his profiled lines the truth,

That if love begins only when you like yourself,

Derek dear, you’ve failed to mask a wealth

Of brittle insincerities.

 

Home now, thank Christ, safe behind the door, the double

Lock and triple

Bolt, our hero of Long Walks Along the Beach

Slumped and sighed, then reached

And loosed the Fun Loving tie and shirt

He’d hoped would hide how Young At Heart

He would forever fail to be.

 

Logging on, a crisp imperative to put the record straight,.

He wrote .’Middle-aged, dull and overweight

Shy, ugly man,  fond of extended spells of self-pity and regret

Seeks the impossible’. His frozen face, for hours set

In a rictus of counterfeit delight,

Thawed into genuine mirth, for the first and only time that night.