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Just Another Line

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Chase, rattle rings and things, Charlie chasing lady.

Moon pools sparkle beneath her thick black lashes

brushing away the lazy dampness of later midnight.

 

Yellow bright lights piss quick, dippy dancing a crazy

to faraway Manchester.

 

Blue note bozos tattooed black wait in tattered corners,

graffiti floozy Queens peddle push all ways.

Sirens table talk sweet treacle nothings nowhere,

love slut promises float like turds into the canal.

 

Gag mat flying pussy candyfloss vortex

Takes her down, takes her away,

faraway and further time,

it’s just another line.

 

Picasso roaming,

foaming into the heart of a Manchester day break

broken she slips out of her shoe,

bleeding into the blue memory stones of somewhere.

She watches rose clouded matadors

paint out politicos with dazzle day streetlight.

 

Later time morning,

she opens lazy brown eyes over magenta and deepest indigo,

smudging the blood seep of city,

what a pity its going to rain.

 

 

◄ Brown as Comfort

He Found a Diamond ►

Comments

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Andy N

Sun 19th Feb 2012 09:57

excellent stuff, Gus.. surprised i missed this when you originally posted it but it's top stuff, man.. measured and direct

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Gus Jonsson

Thu 16th Feb 2012 10:19

Good morning Cynthia
Nice to hear from you , long time no see hope you are well.

I don't think I'm experimenting at least it doesn't start out that way ... I'd like to think perhaps more of a development.
'
'She' is a 'Girl', chasing a Cocaine induced goodtime through a Manchester all nighter... she observes what she perceives as a shallow reflection of her self.

Yes you are correct the 'me' should be 'she'... and I have changed it accordingly...your critique as always invaluable.

Iam pleased my poem interested you and thanks for reading and commenting.

Hope to see you soon .
Love
Gus

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Wed 15th Feb 2012 16:19

I like much about this. Trawling through the images is a kalaedoscopic experience. Are you deliberately experimenting? If anything, I would take out the personal 'me', as it seems almost artificially imposed. I take it that the 'she' is the 'city'. But, jeez, maybe not.

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