If I don't get a white Christmas,

I'll turn the dial that makes it snow.

If I don't get a white Christmas,

I'll kill the switch that lights the sun,

and I'll line up those responsible,

and execute them one by one.

The Christmas elves will shit themselves

with good old Christmas Fear,

if I don’t get a white Christmas

this year.

 Peace on earth at  Christmas time.

Goodwill to all and pantomimes. And,

Frosty the snowman was a frozen lump of fun.

He was made out of snow and the children know

I’m going to blow his fucking brains out

with my automatic gun

and fire a nuclear missile into North Korea,

if I don’t get a white Christmas

this year.