go to the woods -
I stood in the tall mirror
on the border of puberty,
not long before i had learned to see myself.
Glass against foil, a simple trick.
Even though the foil was peeling,revealing itself plain
i believed
in something better
and i looked right in to the point where they say He hides
deep inside the ripples of glass
and i squinted my eyes
knowing it was not right to summon Him so wide and innocent
i knew only the fear
of His constant occult
So, i challenged him.
With black circles drawn under my lids by the bruises
of too many sleepless childhood nights.
I thought id appeal to the source,
with Jesus weeping at the bed
looking upwards.
It was just me and He, i knew would not dare to show Himself all at once.
Id read enough already to know that books don't know everything.
And time cannot be reversed
And through a looking glass is only important here, where its merged, on the pane.
'Give me all you've got' i said
'ill take you on, my biggest fears were easy then,
my demons and goblins, mist thin spectres.
You have nothing but the pure thought of little girls given you already on a plate'
I will not leave my God to struggle alone.
Give me everything you've got'.
Despite that i didn't see it coming
He took my wisdom that i had not yet earned
and left me in a bottomless pit
falling in perpetual spin
into the arms of perpetuity and its solaces along the way
battering with gnarly aged trunks
that would break like brittle branches of its revered elderly
sacrificed for just the poke of a child.
It served me well to remember that a descent is always going down somewhere
or it could not exist as such.
A whole universe of particles passing by
have to be
like Alice tumbling over.
It's good to accept the consequences of picking a fight.
So far, the beast looks weak and flea bit,
crying always for the nourishment of His gaping soul
He's filled with drugsmoke.
He sold it to me that day, his soul
For an hour to come out and play,
in the air on a sunny day,
He was so desperate.
When he got here,
we were just bored and made him walk
home
alone
and set his first snickers of ostracism against him
like brightly sprites, incessant mosquitos that knew the way back
but got him lost
in the woods
and he forgot.