they assured me it would be packed out
way out
see sawing
roll yawing
roller coaster riot
but
I didn’t swing very far at this swingers party
got the wrong night
all the girls wore khaki and cut their hair
 glitterati
very pretty though
but said don’t go down there
so idiot
I stayed at the bar
propping it up
whilst they burned bras
in a literal sense of course.
bar maid rated me
others secretley slated me
I saw it in their eyes
one can only try
to fit in
despite being a painted alpha
seemed not enough
I bet
they are jealous
thar make up applied
not an ounce they tried, all plane jane
and army styled combat pants
they used to ban women in trousers
at gentlemans clubs
I don’t mind either way
its not what rubs me up.
got offered a guided tour of the rooms though.
noticed they had skimped on utility devices
used cat of nines for brooms
found a bride and groom
whipping up a frenzy
got joined by a bloke
who must have ram raided John Menzies
his clothes were leather elbow padesque
he was confused and deluded too.
he got the wrong night n all
he joined me in a combined effort scrawl
we made notes
tried our best to fit in
not a lot swinging for him either
the animals had fled the zoo.
couples singles tv straight mixed lesbian gay
a plethora of tastes
on plastic trays
cant afford the spearmint rhino silver service
so an industrial estate with no alcohol licence
bring your own stash behind the bar
cough at the sordid
and secretly love every minute
serve your own drinks
convince yourself the vice has been going on for years
and it has
and it will.
but not tonight Josephine
feed my hunger Josephine, get from behind the bra
and feed my hunger.

Que the sickly predictable soundtrack
yes you can take your hat off
strip
but I wont tip to that
there shoe goes………………………
bar maid busty Glam
bursting out randy ram
the horns had misted up
she took a break
turned me into an Andrex pup
as I padded round her polished pole
she slid up and down
mistaking it for a goal post
boobs out a taste of hope
maybe a public gropes in order
but no
the protocol
I am unfamiliar
the odd nod wink to give the green light
I ain’t got it right just yet
she trots back to the bar
the khaki army girls play cards bizarre
desensitised by the oversized lady
one glances at me as though I was a person of Perspex
a fixture and fitting
nervously tracing zig zag lines on wet bar tables
transparent and vexed
frustrated and tethering a stallion of questions
wondering what happens next
on the wrong night
at the swingers club.