(As my worldwide fans will know I make, play and sell Cigar Box Guitars)

 

Don’t get me wrong, I’m first to say “I love the NHS”

A beacon of our Welfare State and free; but nonetheless

If I should see a nurse again you’re quite right to assume

In 40, 50 years or more – well, this would be too soon.

And seeing as you’re interested I’ll tell the reason why;

It’s all to do with what blokes do to pass the morning by.

I’d been out in my garage, constructing a guitar;

I’d planed the neck and rubbed it down – in truth, not got so far;

I’d reached a point of waiting as sometimes you have to do

I’d stuck a fretboard to the neck; I’d used Gorilla Glue.

Now at this point Our Gert shows up and wears her normal frown

“I’m off to do some shopping; I’m going into town”.

Now,

          these moments are quite precious and all men will understand

You can’t pass these occasions up to take yourself in hand.

“It’s time to get the Lad out.” I thought, “That’s what I’ll do,

And give it a quick knocking”

                                             ....but forgot about the glue.

I see you’ve got ahead of me, so that’s the reason, YES!

I cowered in that waiting room,

                                               ....SO FUCK THE NHS.