With Thanks

by Harry O`N eill

Thursday 3rd November 2016 10:34 pm (first posted Thursday 6th October 2016 1:55 pm)

(we poets are usually a pessimistically miserable
lot..so something happier for National poet`s day)

The world sits silent round the Eastern stair
The sky grows lovely - lucid now - and calm,
While fresh-fed streams of newly wakened air
Caress my lifted brow like soothing balm.

The tardy remnants of the dark`s black cloud
Pursue the somber rearward of the mass,
Reluctant shreds of midnight`s dismal shroud
Declining slowly down the Western pass.

Now, as the gentle curving of our sphere
Bows to the burgeoning clemency of day,
My thanks for at this moment being here
Bids me humbly bend my knees and pray.

Comments

M.C. Newberry

Mon 21st Nov 2016 15:09

Even better! These measured and uplifting lines remind me
of a favourite poem from earlier times: "A Late Lark" -
and that is VERY satisfying. This deserves its place in
some future anthology of 21st century verse.

Harry O'Neill

Sun 20th Nov 2016 23:29

This is the final revision of this one (honest!)

(I`m too bloody tired, for one thing)

The world sits silent round the Eastern stair
The sky grows lovely - lucid now - and calm,
As soft-fed streams of newly wakened air
Caress my weary brow like soothing balm.

The tardy remnant of the night`s dark cloud
Clings to the dawdling rearward of the mass-
Reluctant frags of midnight`s dismal shroud-
Arching mournfully oe`r the Western pass.

Now, as our planet`s gently curving sphere
Bows to the grace of the resurrecting morn,
My thanks for at this moment being here
Compels me bless the day that I was born.

(in case anyone was worried about an old feller like me being down on his knees) ?

Harry O'Neill

Thu 3rd Nov 2016 22:39

I decided against my first thought (That `rolling rondure` thing seemed a bit pretentious...but I`ve decided to stay on my knees) ?

So the last stanza is now as above.

Oops!...given the curvature and that bow The last Line in stanza two should be `arching over` instead of declining down...I`ll do it later.

(once you start messin` with these bloody things!)

Harry O'Neill

Sat 8th Oct 2016 16:21

Thanks everyone for the comments.

I considered David`s point about poor souls and what
effect the dawn might have on - say - the survivors of
a battle (or an air raid) in those not so long ago days
when so many millions of people were exposed to
so much fearful danger, and it made me alter the last
stanza a bit.

Now, as the rolling rondure of earth`s sphere
Bows to the deliverance of day
The sheer gratefulness for being here
Calls me to reciprocate and pray.

(Even if only to Henley`s `Whatever gods may be` eh?
but perhaps - then - not so `unconquerably` unafraid.)

I`ll alter it later.

Thanks again.

M.C. Newberry

Fri 7th Oct 2016 17:55

Richly rewarding...in its intent and content.
Anyone who - like me - has watched the sun rise over this great city will recognise its silent promise of a new day
and a new beginning...and feel uplifted.

John Coopey

Fri 7th Oct 2016 15:54

Nice one, Harry. It's good to still be vertical, isn't it?

Tom Doolan

Thu 6th Oct 2016 14:31

Nice one Harry :D

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