I'm dreaming of a time when everything is okay.

I'm dreaming that someday he'll wake up and and realize 

that I am waiting for him.

He said he would teach me and I would learn from him,

and I'm dreaming that he'd do that.

I am waiting.

 

He said that Sky gave him feelings he wanted to feel with me,

but not in "that" way.

I'm dreaming he will do that.

I'm dreaming that he will finally recognize that he is my one best friend,

but I'm not quite sure he understands that.

I've only known him since September,

and my life has changed so much since then.

And I'm dreaming that someday, he will give me the chance 

to change his life.

 

But right now, he is stuck.

Stuck in the quicksand, held back by his girl.

But it is a sweet, sugary quicksand,

like she,

and he thinks he can force himself to enjoy it.

But he gets a stomach ache, and is forced behind again.

I dream he'd pull his way out of that already.

 

And then my dreams turn to fantasies 

and suddenly I am dreaming of hands entwined and lips locked and hearts beating.

I realize that I recognize one of those hands,

and two of those lips and the sound of one of the hearts,

as my own.

And I feel guilty that I would want to take that away from somebody.

But I still dream that he looks at me the way he looks at her,

and I can look back at him the same way.

 

But then my dreams fade away and reality hits

and I am sitting across from him and his girl.

His girl.

I dream I am his.

I dream she pulls away.

I dream of sugar-coated kisses that aren't too sweet to get a stomach ache.

I dream of sweaters and small brown eyes and slow songs and partner dances and hands with long fingers and black curly hair that needs cut

of his that I could call mine.

I dream of scarves and green-brown eyes and slow songs and partner dances and piano hands and thick brown hair that needs to grow

of mine that he will call his.

His.

 

And I am snapped out of the dream.